The Heaven Of Vampires

2006-08-10T02:46:00.000+08:00

Hey PEEPS!! I will not be posting anymore entries here... if you are interested please go to http://skyofvampires.blogspot.com/ and give some comments..

2006-08-02T02:54:00.000+08:00

When i was on my way back home.. i saw this little kitten sleeping in a bicycle basket.. seeing it so pitiful i brought her home.. Hmm.. But ricky dun seem to like the new comer.. he keep growling at her.. Also she was afraid of ricky.. I thought give them some time they will get use..
but it dun seem to be like that.. She was veri uncomfortable here.. so i fed her.. gave her some water.. den bring her down to the park nearest to the coffeeshop. hope she can get her food source from there.. Also that place has lesser cats to bully her..
So sorry kitty.. i wish to help u but.. its seem like i can't.. live on please . May God find her a good owner ..

I don't want to send her to SPCA. I know if i send her there.. she will sure be put to sleep.. She is a life for god sake.. If killing a human is a sin and also a crime..
why killing animal are make legal??

I hope more people will agree with me..

2006-07-29T00:22:00.000+08:00

Today had my Main Stdy with kenneth.. so long never see him..
Went with him to see Mona for some admin stuffs.. so my lesson was cut short..
sighh.. bt kenneth extended the lesson abit, though he have to leave actually..
What a nice teacher i have rite.

After that had Fusion Workshop.. so the workshop is about puting student of different streams together to perform a show.. so u will see classical, pop, jazz and world music student come together and perform with their instrument.. And i m so extra cos i m the only trumpeter..

After that went to have lunch with the usual group.. crap alot.. haha think we are the crappiest bunch and also the more guai and hardworking ones..

After lunch went for Gamelan.. Gamelan is an indonesia ensemble.. today we did the javanese gamelan.. when we get better we will learn other gamelan too..
It was veri fun.. need alot of concentration and focus .. also must really count ..

After that took a cab rush home to change den took cab to katong mall to buy flowers ... i saw one veri cute pig in the shop so i bought it for her.. When i see it.. suddenly just thought of her lah.. Den again took cab to cityhall.. i th0ought i will be late.. but i was early.. so ya.. lucky..cos i told myself if i miss the first song .. which she play drumset .. den i not going to watch the rest and dump the flower.. so thank god.. i enjoy the day and concert.. Everything was so good..
except i never ask her to take photo together.. sigh...
Regent did very well.. Be proud man!!

2006-07-23T11:07:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was my second time watching a band that is consider good.
I went to Meridian JC band concert.
They have a guest band from Japan, Meiden High School.

What good about the band is ...
They can articulate and do dynamic so good that..
The concert become their concert..
Not only that..
They have very good stamina..
Played Deep Purple medley twice,
and the second time still sounded the same as the first..
Not only that.. Their Gimmicks ..
Wonderful.. thanks to them i got more idea added to my gimmicks bank.

Today was my last day of freedom.
So tomorrow i will be starting school.
Feeling excited cos i really wanna know how a music life feels like.
SO tomorrow will be having Aural lesson in the morning ..
Haha i was put in A class for Aural which teaches harder stuffs,
and i was told to take ABRSM grade 8 by next year before i go into BA.
Stress like hell!!!

2006-07-20T23:54:00.000+08:00

Today was the best day of my trumpet life!! Finally i got to try instruments!!

I went to Plaza Singapore. Got my way up to Yamaha in a crowded and smelly lift. So i finally reach Yamaha and a few mins later i was hold 2 Xeno trumpets into a practice room to try.
I am impressed with the reverse leadpipe and the Gold brass bell.. It makes the trumpet easier to blow and notes in the upper range sounded more stable and broad.
The only problem is that the tuning note is veri out of tune.. I tried pulling out the slide till it almost drop( jk) but it was still sharp.
Bnyway i m not buying now.. Cos have to try around.

Buying instrument make my brain work.. At least i make an effort to do research about bore size, type of brass used and what is a reverse leadpipe.. Also i learn that, instruments of one same brand and model can be different. ok i m impress by XENO trumpets...

Went back home to sleep cause i was not feeling well .. den was dated out by ogy, erm... actually is the other way round.
Was suppose to meet him 5.30pm at bugis street's bus stop..
but thanks to that kaya jam.. ( not funny) i was very late.. OGY almost kill me with his body slam.. Ok i bought my clothes for OPUS.. hope will look nice

On my journey to meet OGY .. i was irritated by this China woman..
Imagine sitting infront of someone, talking on phone with very loud and ACT CUTE voice.. And the Beijing slang was so heavy .. ok like that i still can tahan..
bt den hor.. her conversation is so immoral lah.. flirting with uncle i think.. den keep saying what " oh darlin", " don't like that lah AR~"", " Nevermind i call you kor kor can". The whole bus can hear her u know.. Finally i cannot tahan.. so i turn around and look at her.. she saw but still talk so loud.. shameless man..

I m not saying all China citizens are like this.. Just those.. thick skins ones.

I m also chinese but just cannot tahan lah.. wah lao .. if pretty still nevermind..
that woman i think 40 plus and look like s***. ok lah appearance not impt lah..
But her action and voice.. ok let all imagine urself. Suay like hell.
I think i gonna use holy water to bath.. two days ago step on a long rusty nail, yesterday lip kena rashes.. Today met idiotic China Woman.. next time go out i will bring books of all religion(aku neutral party but more to those pai pai type) found in singapore.. so mayb wun be that suay.. If not i wear the singapore crest everywhere .. can get rid of evil.. or .. my friends who read this can buy me a jade to wear.. i veri sui bian.. 200 dollar i will be happy.

After that took bus to ubi and go Tkd.. i was sick mah.. so never train.
But after seeing them kicking sandbag, my leg also itchy.. so went kicking also..
my back veri pain lah.. last week spar with one of my coach who is 4 time my size.. kena one kick on my back og my rib cage.. lucky never break.. but nevermind.. cos i gave him a present.. He got one blue black on his shoulder.. lol..so funny lah.. he say his ahma will scold him..

2006-07-18T00:21:00.000+08:00

HOW COULD YOU?"

A man in Grand Rapids, Michigan incredibly took out a US$7,000 fullpage ad in the paper to present the HOW COULD YOU? By Jim Willis, 2001

When I was a puppy, I entertained you with my antics and made you laugh.
You called me your child, and despite a number of chewed shoes anda couple of murdered throw pillows, I became your best friend.
Whenever I was "bad," you'd shake your finger at me and ask "How could you?" -- but then you'd relent and roll me over for a bellyrub.

My housebreaking took a little longer than expected, because you were terribly busy, but we worked on that together.
I remember those nights of nuzzling you in bed and listening to your confidences and secretdreams,and I believed that life could not be any more perfect.

We went for long walks and runs in the park, car rides, stops for ice cream (I only got the cone because "ice cream is bad for dogs" you said), and I took long naps in the sun waiting for you to come home at the end of the day.

Gradually, you began spending more time at work and on your career, and more time searching for a human mate.
I waited for you patiently, comforted you through heartbreaks and disappointments, never chided you aboutbad decisions, and romped with glee at your homecomings, and when you fell in love.

She, now your wife, is not a "dog person" -- still I welcomed her into our home,tried to show her affection, and obeyed her.
I was happy because you were happy.

Then the human babies came along and I shared your excitement.
I was fascinated by their pinkness, how they smelled, and I wanted to mother them, too.
Only she and you worried that I might hurt them, and I spent most of my time banished to another room, or to a dog crate.
Oh, how I wanted to love them, but I became a "prisoner of love."
As they began to grow, I became their friend.
They clung to my fur andpulled themselves up on wobbly legs, poked fingers in my eyes, investigatedmy ears, and gave me kisses on my nose.
I loved everything about them and their touch -- because your touch was now so infrequent -- and I would've defended them with my life if need be.
I would sneak into their beds and listen to their worries and secret dreams, and together we waited for the sound of your car in the driveway.

There had been a time, when others asked you if you had a dog, that you produced a photo of me from your wallet and told them stories about me.
These past few years, you just answered "yes" and changed the subject.
I had gone from being "your dog" to "just a dog," and you resentedevery expenditure on my behalf.

Now, you have a new career opportunity in another city, and you and they will be moving to an apartment that does not allow pets.
You've made the right decision for your "family," but there was a time when I wasyour only family.
I was excited about the car ride until we arrived at the animal shelter.
It smelled of dogs and cats, of fear, of hopelessness.
You filled outthe paperwork and said "I know you will find a good home for her."
They shrugged and gave you a pained look.
They understand the realities facing a middle-aged dog, even one with "papers." You had to pry your son'sfingers loose from my collar as he screamed "No, Daddy! Please don't let them take my dog!"
And I worried for him, and what lessons you had just taught him about friendship and loyalty, about love and responsibility, and about respect for all life.
You gave me a good-bye pat on the head, avoided my eyes, and politely refused to take my collar and leash with you.
You had a deadline tomeet and now I have one, too.
After you left, the two nice ladies said you probably knew about your upcoming move months ago and made no attempt to find me another good home.
They shook their heads and asked "Howcould you?"
They are as attentive to us here in the shelter as their busy schedules allow.

They feed us, of course, but I lost my appetite days ago.
Atfirst, whenever anyone passed my pen, I rushed to the front, hoping it was you that you had changed your mind -- that this was all a bad dream... or I hoped it would at least be someone who cared, anyone who might save me.

When I realized I could not compete with the frolicking for attention of happy puppies, oblivious to their own fate, I retreated to a farcorner and waited. I heard her footsteps as she came for me at the end of the day, and I padded along the aisle after her to a separate room.

A blissfully quiet room. She placed me on the table and rubbed my ears, and told me not to worry. My heart pounded in anticipation of what was to come, but there was also a sense of relief. The prisoner of love had run out of days. As is my nature, I was more concerned about her. The burden which bears weighs heavily on her, and I know that, the same way I knew your every mood.

She gently placed a tourniquet around my foreleg as a tear ran down her cheek. I licked her hand in the same way I used to comfort you so many years ago. She expertly slid the hypodermic needle into my vein. As I felt the sting and the cool liquid coursing through my body, I lay down sleepily, looked into her kind eyes and murmured "How could you?"
Perhaps because she understood my dogspeak, she said "I'm so sorry." She hugged me, and hurriedly explained it was her job to make sure I went to a better place, where I wouldn't be ignored or abused or abandoned,or have to fend for myself -- a place of love and light so very different from this earthly place.

And with my last bit of energy, I tried to convey to her with a thump of my tail that my "How could you?" was not directed at her. It wasdirected at you, My Beloved Master, I was thinking of you. I will think of you and wait for you forever. May everyone in your life continue to show you so much loyalty.

2006-07-16T00:55:00.000+08:00

Hey all..

I know many of my blog fans wants somethings to read from me..
So i hope i wun disappoint you guy with todays entry.

I really cannot think about anything to write..
How about writing my music life??

I started out like everyone..
The first music i listen to is my mum's singing,
songs that are sang to me when i was a baby..
So i grew up as a child who loves singing.
However i was not given a chance to learn,
so i have to learn on my own.

Singing is my first music life..

When i step into primary school.
I hated music lesson,
becos it was alwaes dull and dry..
So i will create lots of rubbish .. plus i hate the teacher so much..

All thanks to my mum again.
One day she came to me and say "i have sign u up in band"
Den i was like.. " Bank?.. Must give how much??"

So the first practice i went i learnt to draw tou ge( bean sprout).
den slowly learn treble clefs den my first and ever scale.. C Major..
So do theory for about a month den finally got my first instrument..
A cornet mouthpiece..

i gong gong keep blowing but no sound.. (still dnno buzzing)..
den my conductor taught us how to buzz.. so keep trying and practice
So we were stuck to mouthpiece for another month.. bored rite??
But all thanks to that one month.. i can buzz well now..

so after 2 months i finally got my real instrument.. A cornet..
shiok .. first time see the instrument as a kid i was so happy ..
borrowed it home to hao lian to my parents..
Den i was veri angry with my aunts becos they say i stupid go play song ka(funeral) for what... !! no class lah they all/... no knowledge also..

So start learning basics and little song..
My first serious song.. "GO FOR IT".. haha ..i still can remember ..

my first performance which was about the end of pri 2.. so i was in band for about a year..
Played 2 song.. " Go For IT" and "Under The Sea".

Slowly i was attach to band.. but.. sadly i was change to french horn when i was in trumpet section for a year.. so need to re-learn everything.. plus f horn is so hard to learn.. But was fun cos f horn section alwaes compare who got more saliva ..
Why??? Becos my conductor say good player will have more saliva.. haha

Ok so i was glue to horn for 4 years.. which was fun lah.. cos .. got alot of solo and also.. my conductor like horn alot..

My first and last syf is in pri sch.. ya forget to say.. i was from Maha Bodhi school.. So my school got a Gold that year and until now 5 Golds in 10 years..
i think 4 time top pri sch band .

Last year of pri sch was veri sad lah.. have to leave the band liao..
Band practice is alwaes so fun .. becos we are pure and innocent .. also everytime break time and after band we sure run to field to play soccer..
veri united..
The last thing that my conductor say to me is.. "Musician must be Humble".

Secondary school was the biggest change in my music life..
Sec 1 due to me being a ex band member.. i was chosen as librarian and was promoted lance corporal and also best recruit.. i was playing clarinet in sec 1 cos i dn wanna play horn anymore.. I was the only sec 1 with post and play first in the section..

Sec 2.. Mr Hashim came and brought significant changes to the band.. i was promoted Drum major den ... so in that year we participated in many display band performances ..

Sec 3 too many things happen..
Proud to participate in Chingay..
But dearest Mr Hashim pass alway .. We always call him father.. and I feel most .. becos he is the one that taught and groom me.. but i dun seems to learn.. disappointing rite...
i still can remember him adjusting my uniform when we were about to perform.

Mr Lim took over the band .. In the beginning i really hated him so much..
I think becos i cannot get use to his style.. so i skip band practice and stuffs..
I always think that he like to pin point on me.. haha
But after some incidents .. i learn to appreciate him..
Thanks for letting me perform for that performance.. i think you have forgotten which one.. Thats the one that woke me up from my dreams...

So after that day i was back to band.. till now i was still with band..

I really wanna thanks this 3 conductors Mr Quek Boon Hui(MBS), Mr Hashim(BNSS) and Mr Lim Yean Hwee..

I wanna walk your path.. Becos i am touch by you people.. your devotion to education inspired me..

2006-07-02T01:50:00.000+08:00

England is so disappointing..

But good for me cos... OGY gonna treat me
cos...i predicted england out..
ENGLAND DESERVE IT...

in the beginning i want them to win..
bt after 15mins of first half i change my mind..

SO sucky lah.. they play..
Better team deserve more!!

AND i hope brazil will lose to france..
I predict total goal one.. france win..

2006-06-30T12:18:00.000+08:00

I always wonder.

Why some people who are not good looking,
vulgar and rude.

yet they have someone by their side.
who shower love upon them.

And me..

Who looks better
trying to be nice and polite.
But single and lonely.

Maybe this is what people often talks about,

FATE....

However i believe Fate is controllable.
We can changed it.
at least slightly..
I cannot just sit below a tree
and wait for an apple to drop.
I m not newton.
Nor i m god.

Miracles do happens,
at least to me.
Because its a miracle that i am still alive.(those who read my entry on mother
should know why).

I find this quotation by an Indian Philosopher suits me alot.

the farthest distance in the world is not separated by life or death,
nor by the place and time...
it is when i stand in front of you
and
u don't know that,
i love you.

If you love someone write their name in a circle not a heart, cuz hearts can break but circles go on forever.

2006-06-22T23:50:00.000+08:00

Monday 19th Jun 2006

Went NAFA band for practice. Played a new song which i forgotten the name. Den run thru variation of theme by Haydn, Richard Adams corrected many stuffs.. And i got lots of rest so veri bored.

After that took a cab home with victor who drop at roxy square . Pack my stuffs and meet YiXin to go Chalet together cos she dunnoe how to go. Eaten dinner before going to dinner .

At chalet was quite fun lah.. Played volleysoccer at the park. crap around.. After hazizi and gang went back. Had ghost story tellng session... Dunnoe whether they really scare anot.
Never sleep enough.. think only 15 mins. Cos most of the time crapping and stoning.

Tue 20th June.

Went back home with yixin again to bath at 6am.. after that meet her again to go back to chalet... Sleep on the bus.. haha too tired. So reach the chalet.. some still sleeping...
Play blackjack with CY, aaron, chenchen and yangbin. Phoebe my finance manager..
Lost lot of money.. thanks to phoebe if not i gonna go broke if she dun stop me...
After that intended to go Escape, but in the end change our mind to go swimming...
AFter swimming went to start fire for BBQ.. Took a very long time. So i give up let the others do. Eat and crap... went out with kelvin kelly and peiyun to buy alcohol..
Drink till whole face red.. haha but i wun get drunk.. haven before .. the most i drank is 6 bottle of hot sake... Went back to chalet and have ghost stories again. Mr lim also can say story u know.. haha
AFter that we played true or dare.. so fun lah.. I m not suppose to say what happen.. cos its confidential as we promise..
They went for night walk.. but i stay at the chalet cos i got veri serious headach.. those that pain till u can punch the floor type/.. Thanks to phoebe again.. she massage my head and i can sleep.

Wed. 21th june

Check out so have to clean the place.. The place was full of bees.. Cos.. we never wipe the place and bbq pit.. so attrated them. In the end manage to get rid of them. Went to eat den home.. Sleep awhile den meet phoebe val anyan yinjie chenchen yangbin and jinwei to go escape...
Was fun lah.. Played till quite late .. den go home...

I should look around more. .. take more notice on things..

2006-06-17T02:07:00.000+08:00

Come to think of it after viewing my past entry. Reading it again give me another view of what i wrote. If i were to put myself in others shoes, i find that what i say can be really quite misunderstanding. I think she should be thinking that its her fault.
Actually its all my fault. Blog without using brain to think. It all my fault.
I seems to be irritating and interrupting her.
I seems to be putting blame on her??
And my words sounded like a sharp edge knife.
I gonna change for sure.
The next time people see me, I must be a changed person.
Stop hurting people and give more care.
Stop being selfish and start thinking about others feeling.
I m so sorry.
I will disappear for sometime.
The next time you see me.
I must impress you.

2006-06-13T21:46:00.000+08:00

I finally asked. At least i know the answer. So i can stop dreaming and get my feet up. It really feels so good to face problem. At least now i know what i want to do.

I decided to change. Both imagine and character. A new me will born.
Gonna concentrate on trumpet and studies.
Once her exam is over and she is not with anyone.
Den i gonna jump out again.
I can give up anything but not her.
She is just too special.
But now i bettter keep low profile
or make myself disappear.

Keep in mind.
I will be waiting.

Yesterday went Nafa to play in their band.
Quite alright not that scary like how Benny describe to me.
Play this Phrasing and Choral studies which i m veri interested
and also Variation on theme by Haydn.(good experience)
Next week will be my second practice there.
Hope they will prepare for concert or what.
Cos at least a aim to walk towards to.

Finding time to take trumpet lesson with kenneth and Najib
also theory with Ms Loh. We just miss last week's lesson with Ms Loh.

Aimming for Distinction for Grade 5 theory this year.
And hope to finish 8 by next year, which i think is quite impossible.
Gonna train on my aural and listening skill.
So many things to do.
Still i mst strive.
Gonna Finish at least one book per week.
SLowly will increase.

2006-06-10T22:52:00.000+08:00

Camp Tetra 3 ended successfully. Our effort finally pays off.

I really dote the display band so much. During the camp, i just want to be with them. Even not doing anything, by looking at them i feel happy.

I simply love seeing juniors learning, growing and changing. Trying their best to get things done and most importantly the spirit and moral building.

The best thing is when they perform and start thinking about the hardwork they put on.
IT can really make urself cry while u play and at the same time make people's hair stand.
Only music that perform thru the heart can reallt touch people. Its just so hard to describe why.

I love my group so much. They always never forget me. No matter eating time, or playing time.
Although i alwae scold and scold. They still treat me nicely. GOOD JOB WASHINGTON. I LOVE YOU... u guy changed so much. Great improvement.

I am glad almost all the stuff i m incharge are successful. At least 75%.
But i feel quite unfair cos most of the thing is i do and i m so exhausted.
Haha anyway, its over. They help me alot also. :)

Tetra green shirts!!!! thanks for all the fun and laugher and all the help u gave me. Let meet up one day for dinner??

Thank Mr chakrit to helping with the drills. Not only that he taught me many things.
Drills, Ttrumpet and also life. Another mentor in my life.

Mr lim, thanks for letting me to play a part in these camp and gave me so many things to do.
Although veri stressful, but i learned how to manage and organise. Thanks

Looking forward to Tetra 4....

2006-06-06T23:23:00.000+08:00

Just came back walking ricky. Genevieve's Caesar is bigger den me!!! haha.. ok ricky and caesar keep playing..

Tomorrow is Tetra so gonna be tiring and fun. Its fun to see youth growing and developing into leaders. It interesting to see how people changed before and after the camp.

Just read her blog. Things changed?? But my heart for u never change. Although my attitude toward u may change, cos .. i felt its better this way.. If u dun think so.. TELL ME!!! ..
actually. i miss you so much.. hope i can sms u and chat with u.. I m letting everything out..

Tetra GONNA RAWK.. dun u think so??

2006-06-02T23:50:00.000+08:00

Read about divorce just now.

I really wonder,
why divorce when at the first place both wanna get marry??.
Feelin fade??

I think marriage most imptly is knowing how to maintain it.
If not prepared den dun get marry.

Worst if there are children born.
They are innocent.
Why hurt them??
They will feel lonely,
they will not be able to trust people anymore.
They become helpless.
Come on be responsible man...

People just take things for granted.
Those that play around with marriage
are not fit to talk about love.

No matter what happen.
Problem must be solve and face.
Divorce is just running alway.

Some couple were together for so many years.
Where are all the memories,
Where are all those feelin they had before.
All Forgotten..

If you really want to play.
Please dun have a child den.
Hurting an innocent for no fcking reason..

2006-06-02T21:31:00.000+08:00

This few days have been busy with tetra pre-camp training. Display drills was tiring. Not physical but mentally for me. I need to conquer my mindset. I must force myself to be strict and to scold. Today my fire burn up to my brain. Pissed off.

Ok i just got the syo reply. Again i failed. sigh.. wasted so much time and money. Mayb i m fated not to go in i think i m just not cut out to be a trumpeter. Bt still i gonna try. Even if i know its impossible. sigh..

My life simply suck... Nothing in place... luckily got tetra to make me bsy so that i can forget everything in my mind... Sucky life!!

2006-05-30T22:54:00.000+08:00

Just finish reading Dororin's blog. The word Maturity inspire me to write something.

Some people always think that they are mature.
Mature is not a simply term.
It is complicated.

Maturity is not how you rank yourself.
It how people see in you.
No matter how mature u think you are,
you can never see yourself as carefully as other sees u.

I once encounter this incident in band.

We organise some games and prepare to play with the new sec 1s.
While playing the games,
there are gals say " What a childish game" and the senior so childish".

What do you think about this??
Familar??

Come on. A mature person will appreciated the hard work the seniors put in.
So now. Who is the immature and childish one??.

I always feel that.
In order to be mature.
You have to be able to think in others shoes.
Appreciate what others did.
Lend out a helping hand to those who need.
Be polite with anyone.
Humble.
Most importantly,
To spread love around.
No sharp tongue that hurt anyone,
even your enermy.

Stop being a childish boy/girl who thinks you are mature,
and start hurting people.
One day, u will eventually find that people around u are shifting further.

Remember, dun point your nose so high.
Its no use showing how great you are when people don't respect you
and appreciate you.
You get what you sow.

CieloVampiro

2006-05-29T14:08:00.000+08:00

Missing someone now??

Come on pick up your phone
and call that person.

Don't wait.

I always advice my friends.
When they miss someone.
Call them.
Talk about anything.

Treasure the time now.
Cos at least you will be able to talk.

If you don't
U may miss that someone forever.
And when you wanna talk,
he/she is no longer there.

I miss my grandma.
But she is no longer here...

Remember,
Don't do things that u will regret.

Don't feel shy,
just call.

Don't hide your feeling.
You never know what will happen the next minute
or second.

You never u will lose anyone dear to you anytime.
No one knows.

Treasure whatever you have now.!!

::: I say so much. I myself also never do... But i really believe it helps alot.

2006-05-26T01:10:00.000+08:00

Hey peeps i just uploaded a video. Its quite a old one but a significant one that stored deep in my heart. I played the game Final Fantasy VIII 3 or 4 years ago. A exciting yet romantic game.

Story line is about Squall( cool school's fighting cadet) falls in love with Rinoa, a girl he met on his school's celebration and one of his school mission. He always act as though he never like her, however deep inside he already knows that she is the one. They went thru lots of hardship. went thru life and death.
Squall was suppose to be dead many time while saving Rinoa. But he survived everytime.
At last he was suppose to die, But their love touches heaven and he was revived and reunion with Rinoa.

My eyes is alway on you, are your big and beautiful eyes on me??

Heres the lyrics: Eyes on me

Whenever sang my songs
On the stage, on my own
Whenever said my words
Wishing they would be heard
I saw you smiling at me
Was it real or just my fantasy?
You'd always be there in the corner
Of this tiny little bar

My last night here for you
Same old songs, just once more
My last night here with you?
Maybe yes, maybe no
I kind of liked it your way
How you shyly placed your eyes on me
Did you ever know
That I had mine on you?

Darling, so there you are
With that look on your face
As if you're never hurt
As if you're never down

Shall I be the one for you
Who pinches you softly but sure
If frown is shown then
I will know that you are no dreamer

So let me come to you
Close as I want to be
Close enough for me
To feel your heart beating fast
And stay there as I whisper
How I love your peaceful eyes on me
Did you ever know
That I had mine on you?

Darling, so share with me
Your love if you have enough
Your tears if you're holding back
Or pain if that's what it is

How can I let you know
I'm more than the dress and the voice
Just reach me out then
You will know that you're not dreaming

Darling, so there you are
With that look on your face
As if you're never hurt
As if you're never down

Shall I be the one for you
Who pinches you softly but sure
If frown is shown then I will know
that you are no dreamer.

2006-05-26T00:21:00.000+08:00

Today had lesson in the morning with Mr Lun.. Never play alot just did some warm up.
Play thru audition pieces and Mr Lun made some comment. He say " If you play like this later, there will not be any problem". sigh

Ok.. took a bus from newton MRT to CCAB.. but heavy rain so i took a cab in.. but told the person tthe wrong address and so he drove me to MOE HQ... so took another cab back to CCAB... I was the second one.. The first was a veri good trumpeter who played haydn's Concerto.. Play veri well.. should not hear becos i think it makes me lose confident..
My audition SUCK BIG TIME... Opening tonguing jam there.. miss some notes..But was able to get all my high notes... and projected well.. hope can get in.. If not i think i gonna give up..
Spend so much money on tutor and this is what i did.. disappoint myself and also Mr Lun...
Damn!!! .. I practice so HARD.. everyday at least 2 hours.. i try whatever Mr Lun say..
ARGH!!!! it SUCK lah!!

After audition went to Regent to pass something to Ms Loh... Den listened to their sec1s..
At least they can play what a wonderful world.. Not say veri good but still for they new member they played well.. Unlike BNSS!!! After that went makan with Dor, Hayaya, Susu and Helmi..
Was fun lah.. jokee around.

After that took Mrt to Eunos and went to BR to see the taekwondo peeps.. i miss todays training. So went there and have some coffee with my coaches..

Today is a Suay day and fuckin sucking DAY>!!!

2006-05-24T20:31:00.000+08:00

See how i die for tomorrows audition...

2006-05-22T11:36:00.000+08:00

Saturday 20th May 2006:

Woke up and realise i cannot walk straight. My head was cracking. So i faster wash up, took some pills and make my way to bedok north. Journey on the bus will always makes me recall
my secondary school life.

Saturday is a day for me to spent all my time on band. Which i used to run alway from when i was sec3. Now it becomes my weekly routine.

Reached the school so waited for them to dismiss the tetrian (those going tetra) for sectional.
So tried to fixed some problem in them.
I am much agree with Mr Chakrit. Teaching is a way of practising too.
You will be able to see common bad habit while a person is playing and throught multiple times
of reminding, you find that when you play, you will also be careful that you wouldn't repeat them.

Some time later, the sec 1s joined in. So i helped Hanis with the sec 1s.
Taught them on "HeyJude". A small improvement, but i hope this week will see a bigger one as performance is coming!!.

After lunch is Display Drills training. It was tiring, but very fun too.
Mr Chakrit taught so many stuffs and i bet he must be quite happy about it.

So many years in band, i think the most happy thing is seeing your junior trained to be leaders.
Seeing them grow into someone independant. Its interesting..

Sunday 21th May 2006:

Meet Yirong at Ubi bus-stop, so we board 22 with rafidah and fitri inside.
We were on our way to Ang Mo Kio to meet the tetra committee to discuss and finalise stuffs.
Were quite happy about this meeting because we really finish most jobs. But there are still many problem hanging there. The meeting lasted 6 hours.

AFter meeting went home to practice trumpet. My lip hurts with that stupid cut. But i will force myself. Audition is this Thursday, got no time to waste.
Night went to Taekwondo. Todays training was alright. Quite motivated to train becos i wanna sweat more. haha...

Monday 22th May 2006

Again i wasted one morning doing nothing. Damn.. Later going bedok north to practice!!

When time comes.
things become unavoidable.

When fate comes.
We met each other.

So long at i have you in my heart,
Tomorrow will always be there for me.

Neverending Love,
is what i swear.

Though i always look at you from far,
But i wish it won't be too far.

If my time end the next minute
i wish ...
i will be in your arm.

A poem for someone, you know who you are.

2006-05-18T09:54:00.000+08:00

Still remember when we were in primary school?
How teacher asked us to write about our mother?.

I felt so different about writing it now.
veri different.
The pain is riding over the joy or complain.
the pain of seeing her leaving you

I was awake with tears.
I dreamt that my mother is leaving the world,
and all the thing she did, all the happy, sad moment,
just flash across my mind.

I really sure that i have a very good mother.
A mother that will never blame anyone if she is treated badly.
A mother who devote her life entirely on her family.
She had suffered so much in the past and now.
And yet she don't blame anyone.
What a great mother i have.

Do everyone of yo know i almost lost my mother on the day i was born?
Its either i die in her stomach or she die and i survive.
But my dad say no matter what she will want me to be out.
On my Birthday, almost cause my mum and dads's life.
After i was out.
My dad was in joyous.
he went drinkng with his friends to celebrate,
however on his way to the hospital,
he got into accident and injure his spine.
That cos him 2 years on bed.
I used to thought that i m a jinx.
But my parent simply dote on the jinx??

After my dad get into the accident.
Mother have to take responsibility to take care of me
and to work.plus she have side effect after my brain.
She is weak at the heart, and she got skin problem.
She is almost weak everywhere.
so she thought of putting me with my grandma's care,
but some people commented that my mother treated
grandma like maid~!!!
so 3 of us moved out to live in a rented flat.

Life was a so much a torture.
she is still young, only 21.
but she have to shoulder the responsible of me and work.
she could have leave with another guy for a better life.
No, she was not like that.

i really find myself a idiot,
who always quarrel, mess the house and not staying at home.
And she alwaes cry after quarrel,
clean up all the mess i did
and staying alone at home.
She alwae encourage me to join band,
in primary school she is the one
who register me.
And i m glad my life was spent with music

Now due to financial problem.
she have to go work again.
i hope that we can have dinner together.
Go out together.

I am sorry mum.
I should understand all your pain and suffering,
i should not add on to it.
pathetic that i have never say
I Love you to you before.
and i really do.
i really miss how you hug me when i was young,
and it have been years.

I really dunnoe what will happen the day she leave me,
I know myself,
i may just be in depression,
a really serious one.
Because i lost the best treasure in life.
Mother's Love.

2006-05-17T01:01:00.000+08:00

Went to Regent today. Learn to build the flagpole and also teaches aaron on mace drill.
After that had dinner with Jama, Aaron, Joseph, Zhen Jun, Ben, and jordan at food culture.

why never talk to her??
you stupid dumbo,
whats stopping you from talking to her??

I dunno, just dun feel right.
I worry if talk to her people will tease??

Dumbo,
wanna talk to her then go for it.
Wasted

sigh... i dunno whats the gap between us??

Age??

not sure..

or u think she is not good enough for you??

NO NO!!
the problem is,
she is too good for me!!

Den i think you are not good enough for her.

Maybe.
sigh...
How i wish i can talk to her,
listen to her voice
and see her every moment.

Den you should go for it!!

I should??

Yeah i should!!
i really should!!

2006-05-13T21:20:00.000+08:00

Today had combined with Mr Chakrit on the display drill song. " The phantom of the Opera".

The arrangement was extremely good. First movement starts with a mysterious and sad horn solo. The rest of the lower instruments come in to form the harmony also melody from trombone and horn. Finally the phantom is out. Burst ... Come the main theme. "Phantom of the Opera".

The rest will explain never time.

The first display drill session starts today. I forgotten many stuff learned last year. But was still ok. Help to tape the concourse and the parade square. Also look after them for the drills.

Had meeting with the Tetra committee. Had many things to settle by next sat. Stress!

2006-05-11T18:02:00.000+08:00

Have you ever want to be perfect?
Its good, that u strive to improve urself.
However nothing in on earth is perfect.
And i m glad that it is.

A perfect world will be too boring.
A world without tears, without anger.
A world with same people around you.
All of them are handsome and pretty.
Most importantly, all people will look the same.
Because they are perfect.

A imperfect world makes people strive.
We know our weakness and try to change it.
We cry when we are sad and laugh when we are happy.
Don't ever think that u dun want to be sad.
If a person never realise what is sadness and pain,
he or she won't understand JOY.

Be happy that you are not perfect.

cielovampiro

2006-05-09T13:11:00.000+08:00

Have you experience one moment,
after having so much fun.
You start to sit alone,
alway from your friends.
Feeling so lonely?..
Perhaps you are like me?

We don't have a True Friend.

Love the most Powerful on earth.
Love bring happiness, joy, smiles,
longing, yearning, peace.
But also Sadness, Pain, Hate..... WAR.

In dilemma??

don't have to be.

Just be responsible, devoted and don't hurt anyone close .
a little bit of care with understanding with help.

2006-05-05T21:45:00.000+08:00

Hey peeps!!

Cielo is BACK

Have been working for the past few days. Nothing special happen. Everyday so systematic.
Cielo wake up at 9am. After washing up, first time to do is on the computer. Practice trumpet with the computer on (dunno for what??). Do a bit of theory homework den exercise abit.
Quite glad with those exercise stuff cos my fatty body is back to the old tone. Afternoon go work lor. After work go home, again on the computer(don't for what also).

Ya i promise a bond with my taekwondo sirs. To teach tkd classes for 2 years.

Friends going to Tetra. There is a news(dunno is bad or good for u). I am in the camp!!
so better train hard ok.
Those current probation leaders in BNSS may hear me say this at the Excos meeting.
Cielo: 1.The path of a leader is like climbling a huge mountain.
One leader climb to the quarter of the mountain, gives up and head back down.
Another leader climb up straight conquering any obsticate he met.
The Last one go around the mountain and finally found that he wasted too much time
and also miss all the learning opportunity he have.

I hope my words will help those who read my blog and strive to be a good leader of ur team and most importantly a good leader of yourself.

A week ago my dad asked me a weird question.
"After you die where you wanna go??
Heaven? Hell?? Earth??

After some thought. I chosen Earth.
Why will choose Earth??.. My dad ask..
why not heaven??.
Heaven frees u from everything.

And thats the point why i don't choose to go heaven.
When i m free from everything.
I will feel useless.
I want the feeling of everything and i don't wanna lose it.

But u have to suffer here. You have to face pain, stress, trouble. my dad said

Problems and stress only helps to build the inner strength in me and makes me a better person.
I learn from every problem i met and as time goes back, all this big problem start seem to be so small becos i already met and conquered. Trouble, Stress and Suffering are Teachers of Life.

Pain??
The most painful thing on earth is not begin stab by a knife or bang down by a car.
The most painful thing is to see your love ones leaving you and yet you are still alive.
However this pain made you treasure everything you have.
And i believe, they will never leave me.
Becos they are always there in my heart.
And do u believe only when there is sadness and pain.
Den you know how much friendship and love is important?
DO you remember one moment when u were veri down
and ur best friend come over and hug u.
remember the moment when you were crying
ur parent hug and kisses you?.

Earth is the seed of everything. I wanna start here, ends here and start back here.
I wanna meet all those i have in this life again and again. Becos i believe in Fate.
And fate will bring us together like how we are now. i wanna repeat. If there isn't tears
there wun be happiness. So heaven is not really a paradise for me.

2006-04-23T23:15:00.000+08:00

Friday 21th april

Went to United World College of SEA to work.. Suppose to work from 8am to 5 pm.. but i stayed for OT.. cos the price is too attractive.. 7pm-10.30pm, 3 and half hour i earn 150 dollar.

Sat 22th april,

Woke up and went to Bn to over look them for drills especially Tetra peeps.. I think my solution is good. Drum major teach and i just walk around and tell her what is wrong and ask her to explain.. They learned last year, so they suppose to have a chance to apply and learn from teaching the younger ones. I remember mr lim say " this is the time for them to learn, our time have pass" something like that cannot really remember. So i think advice will be good enough.
Had section with the section. I ask xiang2, pauline and admad out to practice the fanfare. i felt weird cos i dun hear the seniors playing as a section so i went over. They told me They do self practice and i was like WTH( in my mind). den ask them to sit together and combine they drag and drag.. den gonna go for fanfare practice..

After band Ms Loh talk to asmah, kadri and myself about the sec 1 and also the rest of the section. BIG BIG Problem to solve....

Went National Stadium to watch SYF Display Band competition. TKSS dun perform well this year(quite disappointing). The new band west spring's drum major was good. Bowen did well( congratulation) My bro playing there..

Sigh Memories.. When Bowen step onto the starting point. Mr Hashim come to my mind. When they instrument up, i really wanna cry.. I can still remember Combined Display Band with Bowen, Orchad Park and pioneer for Chingay. I can still recall him arranging our attire like how a father will do. I remembering him always trying so hard. Mr Hashim's marching style will always be in my heart. And i m sure will also be mark deep in Bowen Band and also those student he taught.

Thank you Mr Hashim.. i know its too late..

Sunday 23th april

went to work from 8am - 5pm at UWC SEA again. was fun and tiring.. move lots of thing for the gymnastic competition. after that went to eat with OGY and KELVIN, den kel and i went to wait for cab to go tkd. So coincidently we saw hazizi and victor so we share cab together..

Now i m so tired.

2006-04-19T11:27:00.000+08:00

Hey peeps!! I'm back!!

Have been working hard for the past few days. Cielo think that this will continue for quite sometime. Cielo is sick and tired, but still going to work tonight. So school gonna start quite late.
And all my kawans having school right now. So boring rite??.

i m still thinking whether should go to regent's award night tomorrow??. No one going with me ya??. And also tkd tomorrow mayb will be fun with the new sandbag. I hope it is not very hard or i will just break my leg.

Cielo's life will start to be boring and lonely!!

2006-04-14T00:34:00.000+08:00

Last two days went to kelvin house to stay with yanxiong.. On tue night they need me at my workplace. After we play lan den we cycle to his house.. Its about 1am that we start cycling.. On the way there the wind was nice.. especially the express way at sengkang.. Go Mist.. and at that point of time remind me abot Hong Kong's weather.. Memories man..
So reach his house around 3am den we play monopoly.. xiong went to bath.. he come back.. all of us sleeping liao..
Next day we woke up at 12pm.. eaten lunch (cooked by kel's mum). AFter that around 2pm went out again.. bike to val house to swim.. reach there about 5 plus.. den only kelvin and xiong swim.. We leave at about 6 plus went bedok to eat den go back his house..
On the way, Bought hard liquor.. So went to his house den out agin to play lan.. at last.. go back to his house again.. eat supper den drink whle playng monopoly.. i got rashes after drinking..
first time this happen.. damn.. i think cos of what i eat before drinking.. lucky never kana food poisoning.. cos i heard that cannot eat duck with alcohol.. sigh..
woke up in the afternoon den went home.. cos at night i working..

Congratulation to Steph for being the probation BM for rgt band.. Don't stress to must..
Alwaes think leadership as something to enjoy and not to stress.. Those pressure for leaders
are the healthiest stress in the world.. Learn as much as possible.. It is not difficult when u use ur heart to do it..

2006-04-10T12:21:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, Cielo woke up early.. First thing cielo say.. Shit!! Rain sia... So Cielo pack stuff and went out.. Went to the place early, saw ridzuan .. en he ask why never wear boots>?.. den i rush home to get.. When i go back there many of them are there.. So the match start..
The fleld was wet .. WE KANA THRASH.. 10:1 .. den go back home.. white shirt majam got curry like that .. den wash up abit.. Go out again!!

1pm need to be at toa payoh sport hall for tkd test.. so took a cab there..
The test was ok.. Pattern i somehow forget abt so i pause at some parts to think, Basic kick was alright all thanks to swee yong sir's last min coaching.. Sparring my opponent was kelvin.. i think both of us did well..and we really fight... so got some injury..
After test went to LJS to eat with my coaches.. the place among everyone is from my club.. so i know them.. LJS majam we open want..

After that went to stroll around with kelvin and yuexiang. Den took a bus to bedok reservoir.. Tkd training!! .. Did some basic stuffs and turning kick.. Sparring.. sigh.. my reverse hook hit onto yuexiangs jaw.. my heel went right into it.. den the sound damnn loud.. Lucky in the beginning both of use say play technique and not strength .. so i never use strength .. if noti dunno how to pay him his jaw!!...

Today will practice trumpet and some theory den go to work at night..

gonnamakemyselfbusysothatiwillnotthinkaboutittoomuch..itsjusttoohardtostopthinking,
shealwayappearinmymind..Butithinkihavetoreallytrytostopit..itssopainful!!

2006-04-07T22:57:00.000+08:00

Just this morning cielo blog that today will be a stay at home day.. After that Miss Loh sms cielo saying that she got 2 free tickets for SSO's New World Symphony.. So Cielo went to school to take the tickets from her, also to look at the band rehearsal for the parade.. They dunnoe anything.. but cannot blame them cos we SENIORS never teach them.. so.. not really that bad lah..

AFter that went to foodcourt and makan, chit-chat abit den went to cityhall to meet rafidah..
The concert was the best i ever watch.. Salute man.. Especially the last piece...

The First Piece was Richard Wagner's Rienzi: Overture.. Heavily Brass.. 4 trumpeters .. Gargan, Hyken, Jun, Yap Tien Soon.. I finally understand why my tutor keep asking me to play out.. Cos i played too soft.. My loud is not FF..

Second Piece is A violin Concerto by Miklos Rozsa.. The violinist was skill.. but i think too soft he played... tis like i dun feel that he is playing solo.. But he really express the pieces well..

Third piece.. My favourite in this concert..Antonin Dvorak's Symphony 9 'From the New World'
among all the four movements.. i like the second Largo and last Allegro con fuoco most..
Second movement, Cor Anglais had solo... the lady had veri nice tone .. plus the instrument have a unique tone sound like a combination of Horn and Oboe.. A veri sad and romantic instrument.. Den the melody was pass to the horn den finally to the string.. The first chair Violinist played the solo so well den the vibrato of string break and melt my heart.. A urge to cry..
Last Movement.. I bet many people heard of it somewhere.. TV advertisement?.. Heard in movies?? .. ANother Brassy pieces.. bt this time its few with power of heaven.. Horns and trumpet created a veri full and round brass sound that fills the hall.. When the melody was pass to the string .. It makes everyone tap their fingers or feet.. No one will sleep in this type of concert.. Becos every second in the concert is filled with excitement and new lessons .. Bravo!!!

I got things to do finally.. Go the theory workbook and speciment Paper from ms loh..

tata go do my hw liao!!!

2006-04-07T11:58:00.000+08:00

Today will be another staying at home day for cielo. Nothing so bad about that although its abit boring .. So cielo practice trumpet, did some exercises and drill. Later will start with audition piece.. Cielo kinda fed up because syo audition is in june. Cielo wanna go in fast. !!
So Cielo will be playing Mahler's 5th Symphony the trumpet solo.. and another orchestra offstage solo for C trumpet which cielo forgotten the name.. So C trumpet means cielo gonna transpose the solo.. Tongueing suck like hell.. not even and got those slapping sound..
Slur however inprove.. now cielo can slur from low c to high Bb.. Gonna practise till high C..

Cielo just went to a website which his friend ask him to go.. wwww.sggirls.com . Interested peeps can go and see.. After browsing thru.. Cielo felt that nowadays girls are damn open-minded.. u all go see the website u will will know.. Those picture that posted by other, i got nothing to say.. jst wish to tell them.. they are bastards or bitches who post other peoples indecent pics online.. Those post their own pics .. i can say.. shameless.. those thing are suppose to be private ..Imagine ur bf or future husband know what u did!!..

Nevermind Cielo will stay traditional.. Cos cielo ah ma ah gong, papa, mama all veri traditional..
Thats y cielo never went into a gal room before.. except for cousins, the only person i went in is PEIYUN's room..She my good BRO so nvm.. cielo good boy leh..

2006-04-06T21:52:00.000+08:00

Cielo just went to job interview with Xiong and Kelvin.. On the way to Cityhall.. met Phobe and Val at Eunos.. so coincident.. hear some complain.. expected lah.. Who mixing around with that person??.. i already got bad impression.. and my six sense alwaes rite.. Fidah agree rite.. u should know who i talking about..

People will change.. but some people change till the extent that people are getting irritated by them.. and yet they think that they are right.. If one person commented i can still say u mayb right.. But if many say...Aku really doubt .. People just change lah.. and cielo think after aku heard so much.. not only from one person.. but from many.. Cielo can say that is changing to the worst..

The job interview was ok lah.. bt i dun like that job.. Banquet... cielo's ex job.. serving, walk about.. a tray on one hand.. Lol.. After that went makan .. Den played arcade.. OK>>> SPENT LIKE HELL AGAIN!!!..

2006-04-05T22:49:00.000+08:00

Ok Cielo just change the video.. After my most favourite touching love story.. Now change to my favourite cutie.. Raine Yang's mtv.. She is just too cute.. haha..

2006-04-03T00:03:00.000+08:00

Now its after 12am .. so cielo here wanna talk about yesterdayy~!!

So morning woke up quite early to prepare to go my grandparents tomb to pay respect as its Qing ming Festival.. I don't really believe in burning incense paper and joss stick.. people say they will receive it.. However cielo's thinking that/.. this burning of stuffs is just a way to show respect.. and its a tradition so there must be a logical and better reason...

But someting Cielo believe.. Its the procedure to ask whether they finish eating by throwing 2 coins and it both have the same face den mean not yet.. Why i believe.. Cos everytime thing i see for example my aunt throw 2 time its the same, den she will ask my uncle to throw and also show my ah gong haven eat finish .. so waited for sometime.. den again aunty throw.. so one is tail and is head .. meaning ah gong finish eating liao.. den to confirm she will throw another time and ask my uncle to throw again.. and its the same.. So.. I believe in it..

After that went back home.. so sleep.. but Cielo was awake by thunder ..Wah Lao the thunder majam bomb sia.. i thought what happen .. den rain veri heavily.. Chinese got one saying .. Qing ming shi jie y fen fen.. Means Qing Ming Festival its time for rain to come... legend say thats its becos heaven is touch by human's filial character..

To my family Qing Ming is not only a day to pay respect.. It also a time for everyone to get together.. Also allowing the younger ones to know our root.. I buddhist but i dun need to burn those stuffs.. but my parent and i also will burn.. cos its a tradition mah.. !!

At night have Tkd.. Think maybe becos cielo is sick and also morning breath in too much smoke..
During training.. cielo feels like going to faint and have difficult in breathing.. Cielo Old already.. mayb dying soon.. So people must come and say bye bye to me hor!

2006-04-01T18:44:00.000+08:00

Cielo went to band early in the morning, dak boleh tahan sia. Cos veri sleepy. Den help out with their drills, den did some self-practice.. cielo think that his skill really dropping.. really need to see kenneth liao.. Cielo try to sayang the sec 1 trupmpeter.. but in the end still get angry.. ARGH!!! they damn attitude man.. no words to describe.. But never mind.. cielo got good heart..

After band had theory lesson with Ms loh.. haha she joker lor.. veri funny.. and her way of teaching really make cielo understood.. saltue man.. She damn power lah.. 1 year she get her grade 6,7 and 8.. power rite.. cielo inspired sia.. May be but next year must finish grade 8..

After that went home lor.. Head have been aching for the past 4 days.. may got brain cancer or what.. haha..

While i was stoning, something inspire me..

I got a story for all of u..

There is an old couple.. The man always walk behind the woman..

The woman ask..
Dear why u alwaes walk behind me??

The man answered:
Becos i don't want to die before you..
I don't want u to cry when i m gone
I rather to suffer the days losing you, than allowing you to suffer..

if it can touch ur heart.. den cielo be famous liao!!

Cielo is missing sum1 ..
where is she??

2006-03-31T22:02:00.000+08:00

A summary on 9pm chinese drama Shining Stars

This is really one touching show.. cielo the cold blooded also cry at the end..
The poor girl is really pitiful.. However becos of her pity background, she want
to bring happiness and love to her surrounding peeps..

She is blind, the heart is not blind..
although what she see is all darkness,
but she got more light den us..
Although she is visually handicap, but
she is as cheerful as us normal people..

I really wonder
we
who are perfectly alright,
actually see more darkness...

I agree with her..
Matter Over Matter..
If u believe, u can bent a fork
It ur will..
No matter what religion u are..
there is something that God can never control
Free Will..

I always believe that Fate can be change..
Our is in our hands,
We hold on to our future..

Ah Li .. I m Proud of you... U are the prettiest.. becos u got the
prettiest heart...

Wu Ming, i respect u.. Its the heart that u are looking for.

2006-03-31T16:11:00.000+08:00

today cielo went lasalle with ogy. Ogy went for portfolio interview and cielo went to get deferment letter for Ns.. cielo hope that ns can be defer.. if not cielo gonna cut botak.. haha
AT lasalle cielo watch one cha bo damn lawa.. Look like jolin choi.. think from dance.. dunnoe whether she can wayang like jolin anot..
Today was a lucky day. Saw many chio bu in lasalle.. and i think there are too many there.. u can see them walk in one big ... no many big groups.. buay tahan.. But cielo devoted.. no floweryhearted.. HAHA.. Read about the art scholarship, so cielo gonna apply, if not school fees so expensive, dunnoe can eat how many 1.50 mee soto... So got scholarship mean cielo will be a rich man.. many gal will want.. LOL
Ogy need to go audition to get into lasalle. Quite poor thing lah, cos the person in charge gave him one essay to try for drama.. Den also give one for music.. She even ask ogy whether he wanna audition for wayang wayang(dance) i laugh till my nose shit come out.. HeeHee..
Eh ogy wayang arH!!

AFter lasalle, cielo and ogy went suntec cty pak arcade.. after gaming went to makan at kfc..
suddenly kfc become the restaurants we frequent.. Cos cheap mah.. 4.50 got chicken got burger got drink... bt hor, watashiwa save makan money, in the end the money go to arcade.. haha

After that went home lor, nothing to do so play maple. quite bored with it lah. but bo bian.. nothing to play.. practice trumpet bt ricky keep barking.. cannot tahan den i scold ricky lor.. den he pee.. wth.. now raining elephant and hippo and also lighting and thunder.. Shiok best to Zzzz , but hor cannot sleep leh.. dak boleh tahan..

Cielo's phrase for the day...

"Cannot Merajok, must smile and Face the World.. Its not end of life.. Life have to go on!!!"

Cielo's poem for the day..

Some guy told me things
which i never wish to know.

True or False,
i never know.

Jealousy fills my heart
while i hold my fist.

At last its Trust
that i believe...

I trust you.....

2006-03-30T14:04:00.000+08:00

cielo say that yesterday concert was a great success. The Concerto for Violin and Percussion Orchestra was gr8. First i was amaze by all those weird percussion instruments they used. Some really look very middle east, very interesting. So Ogy is not sleeping...

After interval the second piece is even more impressive. Carmen Suite.. It was arrange by Rodion Shchedrin. He actually tried to put different part of movement together and also added some spices and own creativity into George Bizet's composition. The conductor conducts well. I can see that the Orchestra understand him very well and his conducting makes the orchestra express what he wants.. Impressive ..

Bravo to YST Conservatory Strings and Conservatory Percussion Ensemble..

So morning still feel very bored.. Today only practice awhile becos dun feel good to practice.

Peeps just uploaded a a mtv by Wang Lee Hom. Its call Kiss GoodBye..
Why i upload it becos first when i know the song, i already love it very much.
Den i watch the MTV.. It makes me love it more. The MTV is really touching.
This MTV shows the life of the couple, which is also my ideal love life.
Don't have to be very complicated. Don;t need to live in Big Houses.
I will love a simple life.
Every scene in the MTV are the scene that always come into my mind.
So does it apply to all of you??

Kiss GoodBye!!!

2006-03-24T09:46:00.000+08:00

No Work Means Bored!! i think i really need some work to give me some stress and to kill some time, also to give me money for food.. Yesterday went out to meet Ogy to play arcade.. so there goes my $20, but nvm i not gonna spend anymore.. I been tossing on my bed thinking about my future, i really need money for my future.. First I need money for Degree Education Oversea, then for Wedding, then House, den Family, den Car.. Everything need money.. sigh... I will not want my family to suffer with me..

After Lasalle i will have to serve NS for 2 years.. I hope i get into SAF band so that i can go home everyday.. At least if i got a girlfriend she wun run alway.. lol .. also i can have time on my own instead of staying in camp..

Lasalle will start in mid july, thats long so i gonna find more jobs.. sigh..

Kawans all told me better ask faster before i lost her.. but dunno why there is something that is stopping me.. I m just a wimp... when can i ever get out of this inconfident situation??..
Why i dun have confident????? ....

2006-03-22T18:10:00.000+08:00

Never blog for the past few days becos i have been working non-stop.. So life for me is Work, Eat, Sleep.. Also went to Lasalle to submit my CPF forms and do the payment. Never really practise trumpet much .. Morning woke up 6 plus and go work.. Reach home at 6pm.. So only practise 1 hour at night .. come online to check email den go to sleep..

Yesterday work starts at 12pm.. but still i need to wake s quite early to go lasalle to settle some stuffs.. After that went work.. reach about 12pm.. Quite Slack lor nothing much to do.. But stupid at night injure my finger, lucky it don't affect my trmpet playing.. So after work went to see the doc.. He just press my finger abit den ask abit question .. Everything ended within 5 mins.. And it cost 40 dollars!!.. After went to eat dinner with xiong kel and ogy.. Sold my phone at $220 and now using a lousy phone.. So play arcade and pool after everything den took a cab home from clementi !!! .. haha.. but it was fun.. injureed still play..

Today whole day at home sleep and sleep.. Had some really nice and sweet dreams.. so i miss breakfast and lunch .. now damn hungry!!

Sigh.. i m such a wimp!!

2006-03-15T09:07:00.000+08:00

Summary and Reflection the the camp and Viva La 2

First Day 10/03/2006:

Morning woke up and start to make the section banner with kadri.. So i did some really "artistic" stuff on the banner.. Our section name was Gustav Mahler.. !!

Afternoon went to school to meet the percussion section to go regent and load some instrument to bedok north for the concert.. my cab money cannot be claim from the school!!! nvm.. took cab there and go back to school in the Big truck, so as usual we start singing behind .. sorry Ogy and Hazizi... haha

So after that we load everything into the Ava room and start playing some samba to shiok ourself.. went back home with ogy to take our barang barang also to see how the banner is progressing.. I think Asmah and Kadri did a good job.. clapclapclap..

So we were late for the camp.. late for 1 hour.. haha.. den went to the music room to do some self practise.. After that went to watch Barry Manilow's Video and some video one disney cartoon with classical music played..

So everything ends at around 12, most of the alumni guys were at the physical corner dancing and crapping... Haha Wayne scare of hantu.. so we keep telling ghost story.. den we saw some npcc peeps walk past.. we act sleeping and told kelvin to on the ghostly sound.. at that moment i slowly crawl up and push wayne's leg.. ARGH!!!!! there goes wayne screaming..LOL!!! so the whole night we never sleep..!! Play play and play..

Second day 11/3/2006:

I help to take the PT and it was alright.. cos the members are supporting.. did some small exercises, dance abit den went for a jog around the school..
Breakfast the cheer was not good.. den after that did drills.. Fitri took those that needa learn formation and i took the rest.. It was fun cos i was trying to motivate them and they did get motivated.. So the timing and banging was veri loud and sharp.. Thats the Spirit man !!!..
So combined and sectional..

Then it was lunch, i think.. cannot really remember.. so again cheer was not good..
never really participate with the games.. bt i know that kelly did something bad.. She put bread and pour water into the plate for the games .. the objective is the person must use his/her mouth to take the mnm choco out from the plate of flour.. imagine bread mnm and wet flour??..

Then its dinner time.. and again cheer sux.. lol.. After that we have combied with tutor.. Bt benny cannot make it.. he veri busy..
After that the rest of us went to ava room to enjoy aircon. At 12.15 the ava room lock den we went to the hall to sleep.. but i doze off and the rest still happy playing.. Suddenly they woke me up and i saw they running out of the hall so i followed.. haha saw something funny...
After that we have nice food den we went back to sleep.. In the hall we all kana bite by the mozzzzi den me kadri hazizi cannot tahan so went out the hall to find a better place.. So we think that band room is the best .. so we went to call joel and ogy.. but only joel come with us cos ogy dun wanna wake up.. the room as freee of mozzzi and veri cooling.. best!!

Third Day 12/3/2006:

We woke up first time i heard is Hazizi say.. "They fall in already".. Den we dun dare to go ot cos veri paisei.. den we waited for them to fall out den we fast go to the canteen for breakfast..
Afterr breakfast was game time.. so we played soccer and i got a cut on my knee.. lol..
Den we had sectional follow by lunch..
AFter lunch the band have their nap and alumni had combined with mr lim.. After that we went back to the rooms to sleep tll 4 ++ den make our way to SCH for rehearsal.. U know SCO got one person look like victor and another one look like wayne... So funny..At SCH i was damn piss by the crew there.. So damn strict everything also cannot not like VCH.. Lousy place.. SO we had our rehearsal and Rgt and Hs members came to listen.. The rehearsal was OK.. but we mess up Toccata.. We were running thru.. den suddenly.. The main phrase of the pieces no one was playing.. sigh..
This time we slept inside AVA room.. it was so cold that me ogy hazizi and kelvin uses the charm(dunnoe how to spell) bag to cover our legs.. lol..

Fourth Day, 13/3/2006:

Again we were late .. so we miss PT.. lol

So after breakfast we have self practise.. and out section den the gimmick for copacobana
so did some singing and dancing..

Lunch again the cheer suck..

den combined..

So 6pm was dimissed from sch.. went home bath and stuff den went to bedok to meet hazizi, fauzi, ogy to have dinner .. We went east point's banquet for dinner.. at the MRT station we saw this gal the backview was nice den we ask ogy to check it ot.. Den he turn and say good and pretty.. In the end we see.. Hazizi say" Eh ogy.. People already Mother lah.. U anyhow".. Haha.. so reach banqet the carrot cake there shiok.. $5 the food was like mountain.. 4 of us cannot finish .. lucky kelvin come later.. After that went arcade to play awhile .. some form of stress release before concert.. .. haha..go back that time we again so call disturb people.. we saw another gal.. this time again call ogy go see.. den guess what he run.. den we shout Eh OGY go buyt pisang ar.. I think the gal know so she keep walking faster and faster.. damn funny..

Fifth Day , 14/3.2006 ViVa La 2:

Woke up in the morning.. and find my lip veri dry so keep drinking water.. So did some ironing and reading scores.. So meet hazizi and gang for lunch at techview .. AFter that went to sch to have small combined with mr lim.. run thru abit den pack up to go SCH.. At SCH all was to excited.. and we spot Izzat today in the SCO picture.. they run thru abit den start tunning..
The place was crowded with people.. Business veri good..

So the concert start with Broad Stripes Bright Star.. it was nice lah.. at backstage we can hear that its was alright.. den the Best of all is reveries.. IDHAM.. good job.. all our hairs stand when u play.. Alumni item not that good.. but ogy did well with his solo.. and tico tico veri boring.. lol..
Toccata not as good as the rehearsal, same for Yamato.. But soran and copa we did well.. BN band simply love dancing.. hahaha

After that concert got flowers from Xiong, Dor and Steph.. didn't really took any pictures.. only take with the alumni and with Steph... Haha .. after that inside the bus i was in cloud nine.. joking laughing.. SO happy..

Went back sch heard some stories abot people seeing a small gal in the sch compound.. and jin saw her many times.. once saw her jumping down from the block, second time i not veri sure ..Third time is when i was telling story about this gal cherry.. But my story is a humour.. So at that time she saw her.. So i faster get everyone up to the ava room and also ask th gals to take their stffs into the AVA room.. Yangbin and jnwei also saw her that night in the shower room.. so yangbin came back crying.. Sigh.. So that night we watch The pianist .. Was ok lah.. not say veri nice ... but the chopin's nocturne was nice.. lol.. Den after the show went to play soccer with them.. Mid night playing soccer was shiok.. haha.. i got many cts on my feet cos rnning on rough surface .. after that went to sleep...

2006-03-07T22:28:00.000+08:00

Just did something veri wrong and dumb.. Should not play a part in the prank.. ARGH... i m so idiotic!!! bt i m glad i m brave enough to tell her that i m in it.. instead of lying..
I wun lie to u..!!

Just now went to buy stuffs with kadri.. got kfc meal for free cos my friend is supervisor there..
Den meet ogy to play arcade.. spent 9 DOLLAR!!!..

After that went to Yamaha to play drumset den walk around to kill time cos hazizi and fauzi still haven reach..

After they come, we go to spotlight to buy the string for marimba den went CQ to buy tie..
But we cannot find the shop so just scroll around the place.. oh man in future i will wanna hang arond that place.. its so cool.. But for gals better be careful of wolves!!! ..

I m still so irritated by what i did.. She say she is not angry.. but still i m angry with myself..
How can i prank her !!! ARGH.. It will not happen again.. if not i kana bang by car.. or get cancer
.. or kana stab thousand times to death.. or kana tear apart...!!!!!

DAMN!!!

2006-03-06T20:23:00.000+08:00

Fri- Woke up at 6.30am to prepare for my new job at my tkd coach's sch.. Its was a tiring day,
have to help set up the hall for their school's band concert... Shifting instruments, chairs and arranging stffs.. Bt was glad that i can be able to play a 600++ years old Harpsichord.. Shiok..
The work ended around 4 .30pm den head straight home.. Actually was suppose to meet hazizi and gang to play soccer.. but due to gym and work.. My body was aching all over..

Sat- Woke up den go for band practise.. Have combined with Mr Ho.. den went to teach the sec 1s.. I really one sec1 gal in my section.. She was from my pri sch band.. so was my junior.. But she was so proud.. Com on.. i m also MBS band member.. SO what if MBS got gold for the past ten years.. It not only becos of u.. and ur playing suck... pissed

After that Mr Lim came and we have a fll concert rehearsal.. And it also Sux.. especially Alumni's songs.. After that went to eat with kelly and asmah at Tampines Mall, they need to buy stationary for Sch reopen.. i needa look for books at Yamaha..
Den meet Steph to pass her the tickets for dor, mf, liana, and eliana..

Sun- again wake up at 6+ to go workk. today got one new company.. YAN XIONG.. So we got more fun working.. haha.. the day was even more tiring den fri.. We did lots of shifting and carrying.. and the things are all veri heavy.. After work.. we went to swim at the school's swimming pool.. I tried to dive into the 4 metre deep pool.. haha.. bt cos of the pressure in my ear i can't... almost die inside.. haha
Nite went to tkd.. wah.. so tired still need to train.. we did some pattern stuffs. den proceed with sparring.. I was so gulity.. i kick a black belts head for 4 time.. damn.. cannot control my leg ..
argh.. nvm.. kelvin damn sway.. kana ask to fight with gals.. But as usual.. WE will act injure when we fight half way with GALS..
After that went coffee session with the coaches den HOME

Today- Suppose to go Trumpet Lesson.. but my mum forget to give me the fees.. So practise on my own at home.. My internet was finally fix thats y i canb come and blog.. haha..
The whole day was sleeping .. I GOT A BORED LIFE!!!! School FASTER START!!!

2006-03-01T11:34:00.000+08:00

Been sick for the past 3 days, so was staying at home practising trumpet.. I think my skill getting lousier, kinda fuck up cuz i was practising like, non- stop??. still??

Yeah so today gonna return the CDs i loan and also esplanade library's stuffs.. I need i got a 8 dollar fine for overdue.. Mayb going gym.. ALONE..

My tkd coach jst sms me about a job lobang at his school... He was the OM of this international school at Dover.. So they got some events that need to hired worker .. $50 for 8 hours.. so one hour is around 6 plus plus..

My injure leg is still painful, i think overstretch during tkd training.. Pain for about 1 month.. gosh..

So tomorrow have to go lasalle to ask questions and also to get every little info for opening of school..

Used to think that girls that i can talk and play well are the ideal gal for me, however knowing her, i know that if u really like that person... u wun dare to talk.. haha.. so girls,
the more i talk to u means u are a great friend of mine.. no other intention..

However if i were to approach, den u are what i want..

Alwaes believe in sticking to ONLY ONE

2006-02-23T22:59:00.000+08:00

Being the vice president of the alumni band.. i find that decision making is never by us Ps but always them.. of course i know that we must ask their decision.. But its like come on we got a plan what route the band will be going.. and u people are changing it..
Haha.. its like putting so much fucking effort and people just fucking hack care and do what ever they like.. since u people wanna take charge so much.. wanna give so much comment about us..
den i m happily and willingly giving my post alway.. becos no point that everyone wanna do it their way so why dun give it to THEM... No offence... this alumni suppose to be started by us the 2004 batch.. and now it becos the 2005's band.. WE GOT NO SAY..
I quite agree with kelly now.. for what be in any position.. Member is always the best.. fool around, laugh anytime u want.. dun even have to care whether anyone is talking infront..
More freedom... Thats a good idea isn't it??

Respect ?? ... Damn i know nuts about it, becos the band gave Fucking nut about it too..
One may ask the others to shut up.. the next moment he/she start to talk..
Don't think that i m soft does not mean i m not burning inside... Fucking Hell CARES!!!

What is Love??? .. What is Marriage??

2006-02-23T15:29:00.000+08:00

A student ask a teacher, "what is love?"
The teacher said, "in order to answer your question,
go to the padi field and choose the biggest padi and come back.
But the rule is: you can go throught them only once and cannot turn back to pick."

The student went to the field, go thru first row,
he saw one big padi,
but he wonders....may be there is a bigger one later.
Then he saw another bigger one...
but may be there is a even bigger one waiting for him.
Later, when he finished more than half of the padi field,
he start to realise that the padi is not as big as the previous one he saw,
he know he has missed the biggest one, and he regreted.
So, he ended up went back to the teacher with empty hand. T

he teacher told him, "...that is love,
you keep looking for a better one, but when later you realise,
you have already miss the person...."

:- "What is marriage then?" the student asked. T
he teacher said, "in order to answer your question, go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back.
But the rule is: you can go throught them only once and cannot turn back to pick."

The student went to the corn field,
this time he is careful not to repeat the previous mistake,
when he reach the middle of the field,
he has picked one medium corn that he feel satisfy,
and come back to the teacher.
The teacher told him, "this time you bring back a corn....
you look for one that is just nice, and you have faith and believe this is the best one you get.... that is marriage ..

2006-02-20T23:18:00.000+08:00

Today went to Esplanade with Rafidah to do some research on jazz trumpet.. Actually wanna apply for membership there, but i forget to bring my ic.. so applying tomorrow..(HOPE OGY GO WITH ME). Yah read about Mile Davis never finish it so gonna borrow it tomorrow after applying.

After that went to ABRSM to ask about the graded exams syllebus.. I decided to take grade 5 theory this year. Practical i wait till next year, cos i need to buck up with my singing.. haha..
Tone Guessing not major problem, but i just cannot sing the stuff the person play.. haha..

After that went Eunos to eat with her den went home.. Don't wanna go sch go i never practise enough in the morning so went home to practise for 2 hours.. Finally tongue and slur up C major for 2 Octave without changing my embrocure..

This week not having lesson cos got no money.. so gonna eat less and spent less.. SYO audition i predict will be held in March and also Viva La 2 in March and if sway sawy lasalle dun wan me.. den needa go NAFA for audition also.. Stress..

I WANT KENNETH AS MY TUTOR IF CAN GO LASALLE... BUT STILL SAMUEL HYKEN I THINK WILL TEACH BETTER.. BUT KENNETH VERI NICE....

MY LEG HURT FROM JOGGING AT BEDOK RESERVOIR , TAEKWONDO AND MID NITE CYCLING YESTERDAY... Bt it was FUN

2006-02-14T19:06:00.000+08:00

Haha tonight not going out le.. So i call it Lonely Valentine today.. Stay at home do my theory homework.. if possible i will practise trpt later..

Today simply suck.. On my way to trpt lesson have to pass the underground tunnel from MRT station to Lucky plaza.. the tunnel were filled with people selling roses, couple buying roses.. So i start asking myself.. WHAT M I DOING??.. Spenting valentine with my trumpet and trumpet teacher??... Sigh i m not veri ugly, not fat, dun look dirty, not gangster, never smoke.. only drink.. BUT Y ?? ... Ridiculous.. even ugly, fat, gangsters got gf??.. although i m not a perfect man.. but i m sure i m much better den them..
Nevermind i m just venting, i wun be drag down by it.. COS I GONNA BE STRONG.. I HAVE FAITH ..

sigh called min fang to get her a rose. but she never go for band.. m i that sway??.. haha
min fang and dororin thanks for helping so much.. i appreciate ur help.. KAWAN 4EVER MAN!!
So there goes my 19th valentine.. I HAD NEVER CELEBRATED VALENTINE WITH THE ONE I LOVE BEFORE!!!.. GOD ..FUCK U.. i had never do anything against u..

2006-02-13T20:20:00.000+08:00

Tomorrow will be Valentine Day.. Envy those who got a partner to celebrate with them..
Go tomorrow afternoon gonna have trumpet lesson and night gonna have dinner with dororin min fang ogy mayb hazizi ... And i call it Single's Nite for us..

Only one gal in my mind for the past few months.. haha.. i m just too wishy washy.. dun really have confident.. few i not wrong.. like her for about 3 months.. First time saw her dun really got feeling.. but after the time i went to mengyi house i start to have feeling .. den start smsing her..
Although outside i dn seems to care so much... but inside i really like her ..

But comparing to ogy and hazizi i think its nothing ... Ogy waiting for jx for 2 year plus....
Hazizi waiting for D about a year plus.. They really teaches me , waiting is worth no matter u
get them anot.. at least should do ur best for the one u love.

Something hidden in my heart for so long... Do love me. steph??

2006-02-10T19:46:00.000+08:00

So got my result today..

Chinese : A2
English : B4
Science : C6
Humans : C6
Emaths : D7
Poa : D7

Somehow happy with English and Chinese.. Veri disappointed with Emaths and Science.
POA i already expected it to be like this becos i never go poa lesson after june 2005..
So afternoon waited for result to release online.. after checking went to apply for nanyang fine arts.. JAE i applied for 2 courses in SP, After my friend told me actually i can apply for more den i went to amend the application...

Evening my mm come back with the FORM A.. that i m suppose to wait for it before i apply..
and guess what.. the form say i m eligible for 3 years pre-u .. BUT!!! the stpid JAE dun allow me to amend.. " Sorry u can only amend ur application ONCE" .. DAMN>>
Although i know it will not be easy to get in.. But i really wanna give it a try..
DAMN!!!!!! Stupid system!!..

I GONNA SCREAM MY HEAD OFF!!!!!

2006-01-27T01:19:00.000+08:00

Hey peeps, I'm back with lame storiess about my bloody and bored life.. ACtually it ain't that boring, yeah.. Firstly i wanna announce that i FAILED the audition. Gonna try again in march..
Yah increases my practising hour from 2.5 hrs to 3.5hrs.. Needa work hard for some achievement.. I'm not very disappointed about not getting into SYO, at least i know i m improving.. What i really need now is to concentrate and focus.. And it is something very hard for me becos have been quite busy this few days..

Sun was Fitri's concert, the most impressive is the condctor.. i really admire his conducting.. I WANNA LEARN CONDUCTING FROM A TEACHER... IF mr lim willing to teach i will be GLAD... but i doubt so haha/...

Been going back BNSS almost everyday.. ERM... no is everyday except for last tuesday..

So had some practices with the percussion section for CNY concert.. Things dun really turn out well during rehearsal.. Bt was fixed ..

Went shopping with PeiYun, Jin and kelly .. cos i needa help them choose .. I think i m getting professional in it.. HAHA... EH KELLY AND PEIYUN.. when people praise what u wear.. dun forget about me.. erm.. i just need a meal to fill my stomach..

Just went to Plaza Sing YAMAHA to interview for job as Brass and Woodwind sales asistance.
Hope can get in.. so that can learn from there..

So tomorrow is the CNY concert.. WE WILL DO WELL .. I know it.. just got a gut feeling..
So tomorrow night will again go shooping with the 3 gal.. and also to eat.. Been eating and eating. and never do exercises.. haha .. if i grow fat.. i will be veri happy...

Although everyday i m doing things.. but still i cannot get something out of my mind..
Really it become veri quiet.. veri quiet..
So doing keep working is the only way to stop me from thinking..
ThE FEELING SUX TOTALLY...
Bt i m as cheerful as alwaes..

GOD BLESS..

2006-01-12T00:13:00.000+08:00

So gonna write something..

Yesterday went for trumpet lesson ... I tink i m not improving and my slur jst suck.. and i m stuck at these 2 bars in my audition piece...
Damn...
On the way home saw fidah and paupa.. so follow them to have lunch at bugis KFC.. Ate alot..
I feel that i m releasing stress thru food man.. Eat none stop.. Nah.. its ok.. i grow fat and no one will care.. yeah.. i m pathetic ok.. No gaining sympanty bt just making fuss ..

Went for combined today... Listen and Read some new scores.. Not easy huh..
Den went to practice on our own, After that combined with the band for Toccata.. VERY HARD!!

After band went to eat with hazizi asmah jin and kelly.. so crap around for 2 hours and proceed to bedok.. after that went home.. Nth much ..

I think i really at lost.. Is it one sided?? ... I dunnoe..
I m just too dumb to know...
I think i tried very hard.. and i think i m getting irritating to her..
If she dun think i m .. Bt i myself feel that i m..
So ... I decide to keep quiet.. Silently ... Keeping my feeling in silent...
Although i hate it.. but i think i have to do it....

"Its hard to fall in love.. But if its easy.. den it wun be love"

2006-01-09T10:17:00.000+08:00

Sat went to band ... run thru some scores and sight readed some others... after that have a talk with mr lim concerning the repertoire for the alumni band to perform in ViVa la2.. So we will be playing turquoise daydream, The Longest day and Salut D Amore..

After that meetin, we have a talk with jin wei.. concerning his attitude and being rude to the seniors.. i think ts ok now.. den went for lunch with jin wei den when Plaza Singapura to buy kelly's bday present/... After that went to Esplanade to meetin the the rest..

On te way to esplanade, saw dor and mf in citylink never get to talk mch cos they were rushing.. lol.. Reached esplanade, izzat, fauzi, fairulz, luq, ogy and roy.. crapping and crapping.. den hazizi came .. so while he was finding scores we were at the cafe talking.. haha.. fauzi was attracted to the chinese gal at the cafe cashier.. i bet most of us got attracted..haha
SO i was thirsty, so call fauzi to help me buy drink...
ME: Fauzi.. i wan "put the lime in the coke"(singing)
Fauzi: ok ok(walking toward the cashier)
Cashier: Hi, may i help u??
Fauzi: I want a coke put a lime
Cashier: sorry we dun have that but we got lime coke...
Fauzi:(turn around) shouting:Yong Lin, don't have "Put the lime in the coke"
only have lime coke:

Damn funny sia ... lol..

After that went to eat at this muslim fast food restaurant.. the food was nice.. and FILLING.. SO FULL.

den went to kelly's block to meet fitri asmah susu yangbin.. So played Dai Dee while waiting fpr them to bring kelly down.. haha.. sort of sing bday song.. in a touching way.. den took pictures and CAKE!! .. i stay a while den leave already ..

Yesterday was Grading day.. so get my stuffs for tkd and headed straight to toa payoh sport complex.. Damn i was wet lor.. cos its was raining elephants and Hippo... many place was flooded.. Wet weather also means tense muscles so ... wasn't veri on top form ...
I bet i did badly .. My pattern i forgot one step.. Basic kick.. my back thrash not nice den sparring i kena kelvin as opponent.. so i dun dare kick hard.. cos FRIEND MAH>> FOR WHAT>>..
AFter that went lunch at LJS.. still raining.. crap with our coaches and learn many tkd stuffs and HISTORIES...
After that went Popular.. i bought a book on famous composter.. it was good.. finish on 4 composter le.. still reading..the book consist of details of 100 composters of different period..
AFter that took a bus to BR.. got more tkd training again.. and wtf.. it still bloody raining..
Hey God what u think u are doing.. ya so did many kicking and i learn my next pattern and also learn new kicks and tricks .. Sir also say if march i m free.. he will send me to competition.. Damn... i gonna train hard..i dn wanna be those who kick and score... i wan to be those that play around with my prey...

2006-01-03T00:12:00.000+08:00

1st Jan 2006:

Today is Suaidah's Birthday.. So went Fish and Co with kelly, susu, yangbin, weijie and jin.. The food was gr8.. but the most entertaining thing is the birthday song sung by the crew working there and susu have to wave the sparker stick with all the diner looking at her.. haha.. Kelly Loh r Bday on 7th jan rte.. so gonna be r turn.. heeheehee!!

After leaving Fish and Co, we went to Bugis cos susu wanna buy watch. The first thing me and weijie did at Bugis was to find val and phoebe and we got the BIGGEST ice-cream cone in the world.. haha..

My Dad bought me the Levis shoes that i fancy on ... Thats so cool huh?.. haha

2nd Jan 2006:

Today went to MengYi house.. It was fun, but She wasn't there... haha its ok at least i got friends to play with.. haha

So i was walking to mengyi house.. met dor on the way . when we go in daz, charles jordan zeting and mengyi were already swimming.. and kelvin was slagging at the spa area.. So went lunch first before i start any working out.. After lunch went back to her house and played tennis... was veri fun.. I got a hole on my new levis SOCK!!!! damn... nvm i stll got 2 pair lol... yup after tennis we went gym for some work ot... damn i grow fatter ... 3 weeks nv go gym already..haha so yup did all the stffs i needed to burn my FATS!!.. after that we forced dor to go home and get her swimming stuffs... after she cannot take our nag anymore we give p and went back to get the stuffs... lol so we waited... but cannot control ourselve we swimming first without her.. haha..
Yup she came and the guys played water wrestling.. veri fun and i although die in the water becos JORDAN STEP ONTO ME AND I NV TAKE IN ANY BREATH!!!haha but it was fun..
swim "laps"(dunnoe can be counted as lap anot??) with Dor den i was damn cold becos i simply hate singapore's cold whether .. prefer dry and cold like HK!!..

After that went to wash up.. but instead of drying and washing we were inside the suana( dunnoe how to spell , lazy to check dict also..) stay there veri long and DOr was otside wait.. haha.. Jordan went off first and only left dor kel charles and me.. so went long john for dinner ... chat about many stuffs and mostly band stuffs.. haha so leave around 9.45pm .. yup so home around 11.. haha..

Just chat on the phone with sin yee.. I think that Alumni and the major should talk things out..
I think both side are at wrong.. First Alumni and dun put ourself in their shoes.. and they also nv put themselve in our shoes.. SO i really thing we need to talk.. Alumni should support and encourage.. And not Keep pressing them down and they lost their pride and confident.. I m sorry if i hurt any one from either side.. but thats what i think.. i dun care does not means i GIVEN UP!!!! IT STILL MY BAND AFTER ALL!!!

2006-01-01T01:27:00.000+08:00

Summary of Year 2005.

A challenging year indeed with many bad incidents but also got lots of better ones.. Made many new friends and pals ..

Took my O level result during march, sadly i cannot make it to any poly or JC. So went to register in a private school becos i dun wanna go ITE. Been working and studying.. trying to cope with my studies becos i got lousy teachers in the private school. So i started to appreciate my past teachers in school... Yah start working at waraku. At the start it was fun and enjoyable, but when time passes, the crews there no longer seems to be united .. no more supper and stuffs among us.. I miss those days .. KBOX, Staying over night at East Coast park and supper with them.. but now everyone got our own route to go... Bye Waraku !!!

Was with Shuyi for 1 and a half year and everything ended in August.. Days with her was enjoyable though i can't stand her somethings and also neglected her.. so sorry and carry on stay cheerful always ok... Thanks for the love and concern u gave which i never appreciate. Good Luck and success in everything u do..

2005 was the year that i gain alot Musically... I started to practice dilligently. Got a Tutor. and trying to SYO this year.. Was quite active in BNSS band trying to help them in every possible ways... Got to help out in Tetra 2 .. its was fun and educating.. made make friends from regent and learn much more one leadership.. My grooup PTI was the best and Slagest grp... but we did our job well... thank u ..Hazizi, yewchin and joseph

Becos of band i made a few more friends in rgt .. DORORIN, MENGYI, MINGFANG, STEPHANIE... And also BBQ ... JIA HUI, CHARLES, JORDAN.... They rawk my life.. without all of u... i think i will be living in a dull and boring life... yeah!!!

Went Hk with the band and it was enjoyable.. its was my first time out with band.. and ya i enjoy it.. peeps let look on to thailand ok??

Hougang band camp was something nice and gr8... they got the rite attitude to learn and they appreciate... Hougang band alumnus rawks too.. Friendly, cheerful, fun, !!!

I met someone i really fallen into, fallinf deep and i cannot stop thinking about HER!!!! yeah, its u and u know who ... haha i just simply think that i m not good enough for u.. but yah.. no matter what i will still try my best for u... i will boost my confident soon!!!

I like to thank some peeps that change my life totally!!!
Fitri!!! not forgetting u.. thanks for lenting a hand and helping me out.. in band or other stuffs... yeahh best parnter alwaezz...

KELLY LOH, HAZIZI, FIDAH... 3 of u made mne wanna try for syo audition.. if i get in.. i treat u all dinner ok??... haha

KELVIN CHOE and YAN XIONG... BRO for Life....

DOR, MENGYI, STEPH, MF... know all of u when we had the percussion ensemble thingy.. its was fun to play with u all and indeed i find u all as my best friends... haha... love ya!!!!

HOUGANG AND REGENT BAND!!! i really love and enjoy every moment with u people...

MR LIM YEAN HWEE!!!!!! haha... u change my life!!! totally !! ... a rebellious kid in the past was change into a music person. U dun only teaches me music... i learn about life from u too.. i know my weakness from u.. U are respectable.. ( i know u will feel yuck after seeing all this rite... haha)

Wishes and Aims for 2006:

1) Get into SYO
2) NANYANG FINE ARTS
3) Driving license
4) Grade 5 Theory
5) Great improvement in trumpet
6) Musicianship
7) Cheerful and smilez
8) Bring love into everyone around me
9) Boost confident
10) Be with HER!!!

2005-12-27T13:04:00.000+08:00

24th December .. Dororin's bday and christmas eve...

Morning went out to buy some stuffs, den went back home to sleep and get prepare for the night. After wash up an stuff, start to make my way to gang yuan's house to accompany dororin and some other gals to go count down after their party at his house.. quite fun lah.. After that we were late for count down and so the guy, which is ME have to get punish for being late.. so get a gang bang..oopss.. no is gang spray... so got foam all over my body, in and out.. Hougang band members were there too.. have some fun at orchad den start walking to plaza sing after that went East Coast Park to see fitri cos he was working .. stay there till morning lor..

25th December.. Steph's Bday and Christmas!!!

I reach home at 8 plus.. first thing i do was to drop dead on my bed, WITHOUT BATHING.. woke up around 3pm practice trumpet awhile den got back sleep till 7pm.. wake up buy dinner den online till late night lor.. Lonely Christmas!!!

Yesterday..

Woke up at 6 to take trumpet score from fitri den went geylang for tkd... first i thought it was training.. but i call my sir again, he say it was competition.. damn i wun wanna watch competition.. so i went back home .. sleep from 8 am till 10am.. prepare myself to go becky's house for practice and movie session... before that went to the vcd shop near my house trying to find American Pie Band Camp.. but cannot find.. so loan Volcano High, Hitch and The Gathering..
AFter that took MRT to chua chu kang to meet daz and jordan.. so ya loan the vcd at chua chu kang.. At becky house was fun, we practice our brass quintet stuffs and also did a comparison between gold brass quintet and COP brass quintet.. gold brass quintet i play 1st trpt, daz 2nd trpt and jordan on tuba.. COP brass quintet.. I on tuba, jia hui on 1st trpt and jordan on 2nd trpt.. haha only jia hui plays well.. AFter that steph came so we start the show.. The show was nice although there are some really sick and pervertic part which guys are suppose to like that veri much.. Eh!! Jordan dun act innocent lah the whole show u wah lau here and there.. i know u like rite..!! just joking.. ya after went dinner at lot 1 kfc all alone... see i say musician got sad life.. but its ok with me.. lol...

2005-12-24T00:04:00.000+08:00

Yesterday went to work at night ... restaurant was close at 10pm, 1 hour earlier becos we have christmas party at East Coast Park's Beach Cubana... have a great night, know many friends from different branches... was semi drunk cos estimated i drink more that one barrel of beer.. People keep toasting so have to drink... my friends worst... one of them even kiss in the taxi when they are not even stead.. which is omething i will never do.. lol.. i know my limit .. what can and what cannot do.. Reach home at 3 plus, wash up den sleep..

Today woke up at 6am.. since mon to fri i only sleep for 13 hours... went rgt to have BBQ practice.. BBQ stands for Bedergent Brass Quintet. Run thru some scores, but not yet go into detail.. gonna perform at least 2 pieces for the exchange.. quite stress, cos i m the oldest and 1st trumpet so needa sort something out.. AFter that went home actually need to go work.. but i m too tired so i gave it a miss... sigh... I LOST MY WALLET!!!... ic, mastercard and POSB card lost... DAM... I HAVEN BUY PRESENTS!!!!!!!!!

2005-12-22T17:43:00.000+08:00

Hey christmas coming soon!!!.. Hope will be having fun on that day... But till now, still dn get any invitation or stffs.. mayb gonna have to spend it alone again..
Today the whole that at home pratising trumpet. Go out also got nothing to do.. Ya later going out to work den after work there will be a christmas party at East Coast Park Waraku.. My whole restaurant stuffs will be there... yawn think it will be qite late for me to reach home.. so means !!!! GONNA SLEEP LESSER AGAIN. ...

Once i close my eyes, i see her leaving. Oh.. thats the most horrible dream i ever had.. Damn!!

And i miss her so much...

2005-12-21T14:30:00.000+08:00

First Day at hougang sec(19/12/2005)

meet fidah bought some stuffs for the "night trust walk but no so scary la"(night game), den meet kelly in the cab. when we reach the place first think we do is to talk to the band and the day camp i/c. after that kelly supervise them making sure they know what to set up for the test. fidah and i with helps for HS alumnus we took foot drills. Veri jia lat, cannot bang together, cannot stand straight.
After that took the trumpeters sectional, while the senior are taking their test with mr lim. Musically, they are quite good.
Lunch, we did some cheers before eating and as usual we greet before we eat.. the longest i ever heard. "Good after mr lim, teachers,tutors, alumnus, senior , junior,please join us for lunch" -_-"
After that they have treasure hunt, kelly and i went to practice instrument, later fidah joined us.
AFter the treasure hunt again they had sectional, but i dun wan to take becos their senior there so i let them do the job. I went to bring fitri into the school becos the security guard veri strict.
Den they had combined while the rest of us alumnus were chatting in the classroom. They were nice peeps, veri friendly, nice to mix with.
Footdrills again, now fitri joined us to teach. Den dinner with lots of prayer and poem reading instead of cheer.... ALUMNUS CHEER IS THE BEST!!!. once finish dinner, all of us went to prepare then the stations for night games...
after the preparation we went to the hall for the concert. First was a trombone solo accompanied by piano, pianist is Ms loh wan shan, trombonist is wang tong.(if i remember correctly). AFter the solo perform was a Brass quintet performance, my tutor playing first trumpet.. haha.. AFter that was SQ4, a sax quatet performing lots of JAZZ (unorthedox music, becos the strong beats are opposite from normal musics)stuffs..
AFter that had a clinic with the brass quintet. Learn many knowledge on ensemble playing.

-Night Games (nigh trust walk but not so scary la).
The game was quite ok, but some groups are not able to play every games at different stations. Quite pity, especially those that miss my station. The hardest and challenging one..
- AFter game were shower time and lights out at 2345.

At midnight, BNSS alumnus went to mac with hs teacher, mr roger lee to mac for supper, chat and crap alot there. Sleep around 5 am...

Second Day...

woke up at 7 plus, prepare for breakfast den took them for foot drills, they improve abit.

today is test for the sec 2 peeps and during the test the rest were doing sectional, the alumnus who not teaching were helping to chop woods and preparing the campfire. I accidental cut myself while chopping the woods with axe. lucky only a cut, it it miss and went directly onto my finger, den i will be left with 4... thanx god for not letting me lost my finger.
After that Lunch, and again they chant prayers and poems.....yawn....
while they having talent time preparation i was slagging with fitri inside the room.
At 2 pm i have to meet my tutor for lesson , luckily he come hs so i dun need to go orchad to take lesson. Ok the lesson was enjoyable, i know many of my weakness and did improved.
after that wwhile the rest having games, i was sleeping in the room for 1 hour.Den woke up for practice with Bergent Brass. Did some scores and was quite ok.
So campfire was fun, the group had their performance. Berdegent brass also perform as guest performances. DID lots of CHEERS AND DANCES!!! now i got no voice... lol.. AFter everything ends, we BNSS alumnus with jamakya went supper with mr lim. ok tonight we sleep quite early..
I slept at 3 plus...

Day 3...(today)
Woke up at 6am, took them for PT.. the 3 of us fidah, kelly were veri angry and piss becos they were veri slow and ask them to shout they dun care and give attitude.. give a big scolding.
After that went breakfast, den pack our stuffs becos we ;leaving for alumni meeting in BNSS...
Finally we had our DMAA meeting. quite sucessful. as least we know what we will be doing. President will be Fitri, vice Me, asist conductor , hazizi. AFter that practice trumpet for 1 hour den went home.

Sigh have not been in good mood since Sunday...... sigh..... nvm... i should smile.... :)

2005-12-16T11:23:00.000+08:00

never sleep well yesterday becos i was chatting with my sis online... damn she meet something terrible.. poor thing.. i hope she can get over it soon.. but i know its hard for a gal.. ok.. today gonna practice trumpet den go lunch with kelly and gang.. evening will be at siglap's band pop.. after that meeting friend at east coast.. yup yup.. will not spent alot i hope.. cos i need the money for trmpet lesson.. sigh.. need to confirm a date with mr lun...

2005-12-12T10:50:00.000+08:00

Me with Fidah.. Don't I know Like Zheng Jun??
The crappiest man on earth Yong Lin and the strongest man on earth OGY
Not Forgetting, my HK wife Kelly Loh

Bedergent Band After Concert
Trumpet section having section meeting BNSS trumpet section at the romantic Repulse Bay's Beach
Group 2 at airport after checking in
Ocean Park Entrance

My shopping group.. My family ...
Showing off Passport, which i think almost everyone has one..
World Trade Centre in Room 1206 with me as the foundation
My Bones are cracking.. ROy and Idham. Get Out Please!!!
DMAA Taking Pics together infront of the Hotel we live in (YWCA)

2005-12-04T21:41:00.000+08:00

I will be alway for 5 days... so dun contact me...

2005-12-01T21:25:00.000+08:00

Being travelling from the east to west for the past few days for practices at regent ... Hong Kong trip will start on mon.. hope it will be fun..

Take lots of pics ... hahahaha.. must take with her also.. but dun she want anot.. lol///

my lip veri pain.. got cut..

i m so tired i wanna sleep...

yawn

bye

2005-11-21T10:26:00.000+08:00

dun know what happen to me.. i have not been doing things properly.. trumpet wise i feel that i m not improving.. stamina not good.. technique not good.. its like i have waste 2 hrs a day to practice.. i dun even know whether i can get into snyto.. so fed up with myself.. not only that tkd too.. i use to spar with clear mind and fight with brain.. but yesterday was a total disappointment.. i got no courage to fight.. first i was fight with a friend.. so i dun dare use too much strength.. i was controlling so much that i could not fight freely... damn.. den my knee is hurting me.. damn... i think i spoil my knee.. bt i wun give up.. my tkd sir said that people will stop improving for awhile.. after that period they will improve as a faster pace.. so the graph will not be constantly increasing but will stop at times... Damn i gonna put in more effort in everything..

Hong kong trip is like 2 weeks later.. excited yet worry.. becos everyone is not prepared including myself.. but its was fn last sat becos the alumni are back.. plus regent and hougang people came too .. was messy yet fun... i should stop here... but lastly.. tell everyone i m happy.. becos i m doing thing i like. my family love me and love them.. plus i found someone i like.. that so woah... ok.. its like i got a aim in life that motivate me to move on ... thanks everyone of course friends helped me much too.. thanks

2005-11-12T20:22:00.000+08:00

thurs the day before my maths paper2, i was at NUS watching yong siew toh conservatory orchestra's concert.. it was great.. i love the tone of the trmpeter and i was asking how the hell they project their sound.. i should try..

Fri took my maths paper.. it was ok.. after that went bn for combined and brass sectional..

today.. went bn to take the drills after that practice awhile den make our way to meet the rest to watch sntyo concert,... hazizi, kelly and fidah performing so bought some flowers for them.. but bought xtra cos thought wei jie and victor performing too.. ok we were late and so missed the first song the percussion ensemble.. sorry hazizi.. the concert was like some introduction to music and instrments.. the strings played well... ok after that went to this thail restaruant to eat den go PS walk around lor... den gonna rush to meet friends at east coast for bbq... Damn... the pit is so far alwae, we walk for about 45 mins.. legs breaking u know.. nvm wun die.. ok reach the place den after saying hi and some drinks.. we leave .. so bad rite.. bt i wanna go home rest..

2005-10-24T13:00:00.000+08:00

Sat went for band.. dun really wish to talk about it.. get really sick of it sometimes..
after that went to play pool with regent perc gals( dororin, min fang and stephanie), yan xiong, kelvin, hazizi and fitri. yan xiong left cos he needs to work den stephanie have to meet her mum at tampines.. so went to bugis with the remaining people.. den dororine and min fang went home.. so left with only kelvin fitri and hazizi. den we break fast with them together.. nice experience especially the prayer part.. shared a 8 piece meal with kelvin .. damn full... after that took cab to bedok to meet nadirah, fairulz, gadzali and ogy..

Sun nothing special.. i clean up my room the whole day.. threw many things away. night went for tkd training.. erm..finally BR tkd gott body guard.. so can spar easily.. no pain.. haha.. so they annouce the result for grading.. kelvin, jordon, qiao chun and me got double promotion.. so gonna get green belt the next grading.. before tat i alwaes want double promotion.. But... now no more.. cos i ned time to train before i get black.. so double means my time get shorter.. and also.. my friends who dun get double will be sad .. So please those who get double promotion or any promotion in life.. stay humble.. Finally i said this yesterday. " Getting double promotion is no big deal, friendship is what i desire in tkd, i come for training is to have fun with friends, dun let this double promotion thingy spoil the friendship, and again i say.. its no big deal". the principal of tkd... SPIME. Self-control, perseverance, integrity, modesty, entiquet

No matter what i have, or what i get. i m myself.. i wun change becos of anything. i will only change becos i want to. and i think i have to..

Regrets II

2005-10-18T13:56:00.000+08:00

The promises of life and death,
ashamed to voice again.

Meeting with my head down
would rather keep missing.

Giving up comes into mind
so everything can be gone.

Being stranger will feel better
Is another grave mistake.

Wishing to go back to the past
Helding up ur hands once again
Sitting quiet on the beach
listening to the sea breeze.

How can i ever change,
Rewrite the mistakes i have done.

Now even if i want to be with u,
i cannot even say.

2005-10-17T10:49:00.000+08:00

Fri went for sectional . Erm the band sounded bad, but it was expected. Given them such a long break i m sure most of them left their instrument at one corner collecting dust and webs.. But now exams over, so no more excuses. Hong Kong Trip coming, Orientation, Viva La Musica 2.
Do they know how important it is??. No urgency. After that went to the biggest Swee Lee music shop, i was expecting more stuff for winds, but i was shock to find no winds stuff at all.. Only instrument stands.. But they got lots and lots of guitars, drums and audio equiments.. After went to work..

Sat morning went for band practice. First did drills with them. Do so twisting hip exercise to train them to use their hip to turn when Pusang. AFter that sectional, did some basics with hui shi. Basic is always important, the fundamental. Then practice some parts of merry widow with her. Then combined with mr lim. The King and I took a long time to practice. It look simple but to play it well its hard. The band laughed when he sang "Thailand" for the few two bar. lol/...
Didn't finish the whole combine with the band becos i had to rush to VCH for trumpet lesson with mr yap.. Took a cab there.. I thought i was gonna be late, but surprise that the teacher is late but not his fault becos he was rehearsing with his fellow trumpeter in the concert hall... Woah so happy to hear the 4 best trumpet player in singapore playing a quintet. Their tone was so clean... Articulate everything sharply. i envious most is their tongueing.
After that went to eat with yuexiang and kelvin. den again initial D.. night work. after work went to eat at Tamako(japanese restarant) at orchade with my colleage and manager. It was to celebration one of the manager and my bday. With yue xiang, we drinks lots of hot sake. non- stop. Did some riddles and games...

Sun morning. I was practicing for 3 hours becos yesterday learn so much so gonna practice so that i will not forget. after that went for a nap cos i was veri tired this few days..i had been coughing for 3 weeks, having sore throat for 2 weeks. but never see a doc. wun die...
After that went to my great grandma's bday dinner. den went for taekwondo. It was raining so we use another place to train. did stamina training and kicking. No pattern cos grading over.. after lesson spar with yue xiang and kavin sir. Got a bruise on my eyes there cos got one kick on it...

2005-10-13T10:52:00.000+08:00

I will wish that u will die before me. So that i will no see u crying and heartbroken.

Yesterday went to school to band practice. Lent a trumpet from fitri cos my trumpet is old and the material gets thiner.. yup.. So ya i get myself a tutor.. first lesson this sat 1.30pm and VCH..
Mr Yap from sso.. so excited.. sigh.. gonna pay another 100 dollar for the hongkong trip.. i totally broke already.. anyone wanna treat can find me.. lol...

After that went to plaza sing with hazizi izzat kelvin.. so sorry to them cos i played arcade with yuexiang that i left them out.. after arcade when for lunch at yoshinoya den walk to orchad.

went to many of shopping mall to look at stuffs. ya we saw toyota trueno AE86 t cineleisure.. dunnoe how to spell.. then waited for yuexiang's girlfriend.. on our way to the mrt station to go our next destination "Changi". I was approach by a guy and a gal.. with phone number on a paper." that gal there give u this".. what i did was.. throw it in the rubbish bin after that.. Com ON I GOT A GAL IN MIND...bt of course not infront of her lah..

after that yuexiang say wanna go changi see gays... veri "good" idea that we took mrt den bus... went there.. NO GAYS.... DAMN.. but its ok cos being their joker i keep joking.. we wenbt for prata after that.. shiok den took cab home.. today spent like 40 total.. ya.. forgotten plus coffee at paragon coffee bean...

2005-10-12T10:03:00.000+08:00

I love musicals .. The stories touching me. The songs stay in my mind. The scene too..

Getting to know musicals from band. i watched "Phantom of Opera", "Cats", "Carmen", "Romeo and Julia".. Read " Les Miserables", Listen to soundtrack of those listed above plus "chess"..

Get to Watch Jacky cheung's cantonese musical " Xue Lang Hu"(Snow Wolf Lake)

where snow is the gal, wolf is the guy lake is the lake form by the tears of the guy for the death of the gal..

SO i thought of writing one.. please comment..

Act 7

Stepping on the cloud, feeling the lightness of his body, Cielo can no longer feel the ach he had on earth. Now in heaven, his body start changing. Back straighten, knees no longer aching. He start to run, like a child who just started to know how running feels.

Still not knowing he is already dead after the car crash, he thought he was dreaming, a very nice dream indeed. He wander about the place, suddenly a flash of light shone, the light was so strong that he had to shut his eyes and his hands were trying to shield his face from it. When he regain his sight, he saw a staircase leading toward a gate, which looks familar, but at that moment he can't make anything out of it in his mind.

Walking towards the gate, he gave a slight push, the gate shones when it opened. A door was waiting half close as if he was expected. when he walk closer to the door, a familar voice was hear singing. The voice brought tears to his eyes, yet feeling warmth inside.

(Voice singing)

Lost love is love.

just another form of it.

can't get to see them,

can't bring them food,

tousle with their hair,

or dance with them.

Those senses weaken

another heightens.

Memory.

It becomes your partner.

Nuture it,

hold it and

dance with it.

Life have to end

But love doesn't

Lost love is strong.

so strong that i feel in heaven.
Touches angels and holy ghosts

touches the Lord.

touches me.

The door was pushed to a big bang. a familar backview of the woman sitting back facing him on a chair of the 80s.

Cielo : " Sarah? ...This that u?" (He was stun, words have to be force to be said from his mouth)

Rising from the chair, she turned around. She look young and pretty, with a green gown which was her favourite when she was alive. Cielo run toward her and hug her close.

Sarah, married to Cielo when she was 20 and Cielo 25, died from an accident. The phone rang,

Sarah: Hello, Sarah speaking, whose that on the phone

Nurse: I m cherlyn from Republic hospital, ur husband fall from the stair, he is now in coma

Please hurry to see him.

Without listening more, sarah hang up the phone, took her windbreaker and went up to her car.

She was driving at high speed and was pushing it further. Suddenly a taxi appear from the T junction, and in no time the car crash into it.. She was sent to the hospital, but dead during the journey there. She was only 35.

It had been 30 years Ceilo had seen his wife. He could feel his heart tearing due to the longing and yearning. He was guilty that he cause her death.

(They Sing)

(Cielo)

Time were short

when together.

grews long

When u leave....

(Sarah)

Its not short

For i treasures.

worth

as its for my man.

(Cielo)

i long

i yearn

I m sorry

(sarah)

No you don't

you are not to blame..

(Cielo)

Sarah...

I love you

every little moment.

you were alway here

here in my heart.

always staying

never leaving..

(Sarah)

Cielo..

Iknow

I feel

here on heaven.

Thats how strong

lost love can be..

Thats how much

it touches angels, holy ghosts

touches the Lord .

Touches me....

Cielo: Heaven?? this is heaven??.. What has happen to me??..

Sarah: A car crash.

Cielo: I was driving, then i was drunk. Then for what i know i was here.

Sarah: U were dead after u were sent into hospital. U lost too much blood.

Cielo: I m glad, at least i see u here. Its worth

Sarah: Sorry Cielo.. (sad tone)

Cielo: What Happen?..

Sarah: i got to leave...

Cielo: Why?..

Sarah: I recarnating. It suppose to be years ago. But i want to wait for u. To see u here.

I fulfilled my wish so i need to go...

Cielo: Finally i get to see u, but u are leaving again. No i m not gonna let u go

Sarah: Cielo do you love me?

Cielo : Of course i do.

Sarah : Remember,everything in the world ends, but love don't

Everything can be forgotten, but the feeling will never.

Love is enternal, so do fate. We will meet again if our love is strong.

U believe in miracle, it will happen. Don't u find it a miracle that we

get to know each other and love each other.

Cielo: (Tears filled his eyes, but he started to smile. )

I believe we will see each other. I never doubt my love for you.

I understand . Just that i don't bear to see u leave. I will turn around leave quickly. ( Cielo turns )

Suddenly he felt his heart cracking and the emptiness behind . He did not turn back, he just walk and keep walking..

(voice of sarah somewhere)
We will meet one day

holding hand lying below the starry night

listening to insect chirking.

listening to each others heartbeat

falling asleep beside each other

never leaving.. never ending...

How long will Cielo need to see his wife again.. No one knows... but something certain.. they will meet...

2005-10-10T12:17:00.000+08:00

ok yesterday was my BIRTHDAY.. receive presents and greeting.. those who never greet or give presents!!!! ... its ok cos i dun really care about my birthday.. bt i thanks those who were so sweet especially asmah .. she called me to wish me..

ok my birthday was my taekwondo grading day too.. hope my birthday luck will let me double promote.. can save money and save time.. so yesterday play till really siao at toa payoh sports hall.. lol..

Peiyun bough me this book at The Art Of Practicing.. this book i lent it from the library last tme. although i finish reading.. bt i thought of telling the people i lost it so that i can buy from library
so coincident she bought it for me.. so yup gonna return that book.. Music lovers .. this is a veri good book interested can contact me..

I m happy that most people wish me bday.. i m especially happy that one unexpected person wish me.. only a few words makes me really happy.. SY thanks

Regrets

2005-10-06T11:59:00.000+08:00

Regrets

Remember years ago
when we were still young and sweet
for many times fate brought us together.and pull us apart.
But love never leave anyone of us

One night
my phone rang and u were on the other line
sounded as though u cried
keeping silent for awhile
den u start to say..

[*I need to leave u please do not cry
please don't be sad
my love have fade
u were nothing to me.
please don't have to care
and dun waste ur youth on me
thanks for ignoring and taking me for granted in the past.
and
listen here
i dun love u anymore]

time passes so fast
we were old and weak
looking at me lying on the bed
my breath getting weaker and weaker
but still my eyes never stop looking at u

Ur eyes started to wet
slowly i held up ur hand
my tears finally drop
silently i say...

[*I need to leave forever
please do not cry
please don't be sad
although my body left u
but my soul will never leave.
U have to believe that
one day we will hold hand in hand
strolling on the beach
listening to the waves
and
listening to me saying
I love u so]

Some memories inspired me to write this lyrics.. its not very good i know.. so please give some comment..

I name the song REGRETS becos obviously the lyrics tells u why..
First the guy regretted becos of him ignoring, neglecting and taking the gal for granted whch cos the gal to leave him.
Second the gal, actually still love the guy, she left him becos she cannot stand being hurt anymore. So when they both grew old and the guy is dying, she started to regret, but the guy leave and can never return..

Moral of the story : Please don't do things that u will regret.. And i believe we can be brainwash or we can go heartless.. but love can never be forgotten..

2005-10-06T10:48:00.000+08:00

Yesterday went to fidah house to get the form for hong kong trip.. i dunnoe whether i can go anot .. tell my parent they like so reluctant to let me go.. after that went tkd training at bedok ite.. my kicks deprove so much .. sigh.. grading is on sun.. so gonna work hard.. i face some problem with the new mouthpiece.. i feel that it dun satisfied me.. mayb getting another one.. my trmpet also gonna change soon.. but first talk about tutor hong kong trip and syo.. i gonna go broke.. hong kong trip i think i will be paying myself.. den tutor fee also.. sigh.. gonna take grade 5 theory the coming march.. den driving license.. so many things.. Yesterday night took cab with yuexiang to thai express at siglap.. He and his dar dar desiree gonna treat me cos of my bday is on this sun.. but thai express close le so went cafe cartel... the food was nice. Thanks Pals.. lol..
Other den my parent they are the first friends and couple to treat me for my bday.. honour??? .. not really.. lol cos knowing me i think is the biggest fault they have.. lol.. i was born a devil to bully people ... so ya.. gonna help both of them for audition ay syo too.. woah so many people joining me for syo.. SO LEE YUE XIANG ..SEE U ON THE 15TH OF OCT AT BNSS...

2005-09-27T18:17:00.000+08:00

yesterday went to NUS Yong Siew Toh Conservatory for Music to attend a trumpet recital and masterclass by Dai Zhong Hui, principal trumpet of the National Symphony Orchestra of China. I notice how important that blowing air forward is important, learn how to articulate, phrase. I was late. While waiting for the door to open saw mr lim coming too.. Guess what one of the piece he played "Variations on Beautiful snow" by J.B Arban was the piece i was preparing for SYO audition.. The masterclass was conducted differently from the one given by Lertkiat. I think becos teaching at University so the method is different.. Student goes and play a piece and he will comment and correct.. The last student played "trumpet concerto in Eb" By F.J Haydn. A popular trumpet concerto and also is my favourite especially the second movement.

Mr lim asked me to get a SSO tutor, he help me get the number of this trumpeter Samuel Hyken. He charge $80/ hr.. i gonna discuss with parent see whether they wanna pay half for me.. i gonna take lesson once a month i think.. cos i damn budget now..

Today finally got myself a mouthpiece that suits me.. in the past i used a 3C denis wick.. but accidentally lose it. So lent a 7C vncent bach from BNSS. Finally can relieve my lip from squeezing on a small mouthpiece.. Yup i bought a Benge size 1 mouthpiece. After trying i think its is easily and nicer to play den vncent bach 1C. I feel veri good using it.. Playing become flexible and tone become nicer.. An impt advice to brass player.. get a mouthpiece that suits ur lip.. it really feels like a big feet in a small shoes or a loose pant on a slim waist.. its uncomfortable.. So gonna go study.. O level coming.. sigh

2005-09-25T13:23:00.000+08:00

Fri had section with regent for the nov concert.. yup gotto play 2 pieces.. brazilian dance and canon in D.. my sight reading so slow.. lol.. journey there was long and tireing but at least its worth it.. had lots of fun.. after that went to Lot1's long john silver for dinner den took bus 67 stop at syo training base there den change to 66.. tooks us more den 1 hour.

Yesterday went Lot1 again to meet dororin, min fang and kelvin. Bt kelvin was damn late(pissed).. so 3 of us went to meng yi house den when for lunch.. after that kelvin came.. and we went back to meng yi house to study.. lol.. awhile later all of us went to play tennis.. its was fun but hard to pick up.. den went to gym for air con.. after that everyone went back lor.. kelvin and i went lot1 to play arcade den went TM to shop.. lol..

Today study in the morning den now online lah.. later gonna send my phone for service cos i drop it hard on regent's floor.. i so careless .. den after that go study with my tkd coach.. den tkd.. yup.. people tag my board ok.. lol

2005-09-14T12:49:00.000+08:00

Artist: Daniel Bedingfield
Album: If You're Not The One Title: If You're Not The One

If you’re not the one then why does my soul feel glad today?
If you’re not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way?
If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call
If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all

I never know what the future brings
But I know you are here with me now
We’ll make it through
And I hope you are the one I share my life with

I don’t want to run away but I can’t take it,
I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

If I don’t need you then why am I crying on my bed?
If I don’t need you then why does your name resound in my head?
If you’re not for me then why does this distance maim my life?
If you’re not for me then why do I dream of you as my wife?

I don’t know why you’re so far away
But I know that this much is true

We’ll make it through
And I hope you are the one I share my life with
And I wish that you could be the one I die with
And I pray in you’re the one
I build my home with
I hope I love you all my life

I don’t want to run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

‘Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away
And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today
‘ Cause I love you, whether it’s wrong or right
And though I can’t be with you tonight
And know my heart is by your side

I don’t want to run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I

2005-09-09T15:15:00.000+08:00

Yesterday so called quarrel again.. its like i dun wanna quarrel bt things keep happening.. she say i m lying .. yeah i m lying. but tell her the true i scare things will be worst.. just when to read our blog.. chrisjaime blog.. yeah.. everything is in the past.. she say cannot go back to the past.. but i hope for a new future.. a future with her.. a future with happiest and laughter.. Sigh.. she say that i never say for her.. i jst dun wanna put it on my lip... if she wan care she should have tell me earlier and not make me keep doing wrong things.. indeed i was wrong and i dun wish to find any excuse . what can i do is to change myself to the better .. and keep waiting.. waiting..
I just wanna hear..

Say you’ll share with me
One love, one lifetime
Lead me, save me from my solitude

Say you want me
With you here Beside you
Anywhere you go
Let me go too
Jaime
that’s all I ask of you..

I know i was wrong in the past.. i pray for her forgiveness.. without her.. there isn't colour..
i can lie about everything.. but i dun lie about my feeling for u..
indeed i m a big liar.. i'm sorry

2005-09-03T01:02:00.000+08:00

In the morning finished some chapters of physic and copied some notes. Time is running short and O level is around the corner. Everyday life is only music work and studies. So damn stress up, actually when time are managed well, u will eventually find that there is a lot of time and the day seems very full. After surfing the net for music and instrumental stuff, i realise that i need to save to buy so many things. First i need a 1C mouthpiece, then a trumpet bag, then need books on trumpet playing. Thats gonna cost me all the money in my bank. Ya after O gonna audition at SYO and NAFA. So i need to practice real hard. yup thats all folk for the day.. Last thing.. Broadway song is damn nice..!!

I know Her not so well..

2005-08-30T10:11:00.000+08:00

After hearing the band plays Highlight from chess.. i found the lyrics for the part that i love most.. I know him so well.. its talk so much about what i feel inside.. so i gonna paste it here. i did some corection to the lyrics.. becos if i gonna put HIM.. i gonna be a gay.. bt i gonna say.. i know her not so well in the past.. but now i know so much.. and understand so much. but its already the past..

I Know Him So Well lyrics

Artist - ChessAlbum - Various SongsLyrics - I Know her So Well

Nothing is so good it lasts eternallyPerfect situations must go wrong
But this has never yet prevented meWanting far too much for far too long
Looking back I could have played it differently
Won a few more moments, who can tell?
But it took time to understand the gal
Now at least I know I know her well
Wasn't it good?
(Oh so good)
Wasn't she fine?
(Oh so fine)
Isn't it madness?
she can't be mine?
But in the end she needs a little bit more than me
More security
(she needs her fantasy and freedom)
I know her so well
No one in your life is with you constantly
No one is completely on your side
And though I move my world to be with her
Still the gap between us is too wide
Looking back I could have played it differently
Looking back I could have played it some other way
Learned about the gal before I fell
(I was just a little careless maybe)
But I was ever so much younger then
Now at least I know her well
(Now at least)
I know I know her well
(Wasn't it good?)
Oh so good
(Wasn't she fine?)
Oh so fine
(Isn't it madness)
she won't be mine?
Didn't I know
How it would go?
If I knew from the start
Why am I falling apart?
(Wasn't it good?Wasn't she fine)
Isn't it madness
she won't be mine?
Isn't it madness
she won't be mine?
But in the end she needs a little bit more than me -More security
(she needs his fantasy and freedom)
I know her so well
(It took time to understand her)
I know her so well.

2005-08-28T11:43:00.000+08:00

Yesterday the band performed at sentosa. The alumni was having fun strolling around sentosa.. walked from siloso beach to palawan beach to get water.. i don't mean from the sea of course.. get water from 7-eleven. many things happen lah.. but was fun..

I was so happy i can help her with her things.. although she keep telling me "no string attach"
but to me.. the string already attach.. if not i wun even care. ya get scream by her so much.. lol
never change. still so naggy.. lol. but she did well with her conducting.. i m postive about that..
i will try not to be optimistic.. becos pessimistic means i dun believe i can woo her back.. so i gonna strive.

Whats worrying me now is the band.. yesterday i was veri pissed by them.. slow slow slow.. cannot really blame the leaders.. becos its veri messy.. but the members call them to help. they jst sit there thinking that they are princes and princesses.. that does not mean i've given up..
i will still try to help as i could..

2005-08-24T11:58:00.000+08:00

Damn O level s coming.. and i just started to copy notes.. never really start to revise.. lol.. i will still strive hard to get below 14 for L1R4.. my tkd grading will be on 9 oct MY BDAY.. but think this year it wun be a good one.. sigh.. forget it anyway i regret alot of things.. lost alot of things... should i say i m use to it.. or i should strive hard and get them back.. lol.. anyway.. i wun be defeated so easily..

2005-08-15T08:30:00.000+08:00

1 yr and 3mths of relationship ends here.. chrisjaime is now apart.. but those memorises will still be in my head.. I always wish that chrisjaime will no end.. its like people thought i don't care about this relationship. but actually i did. Haha the funs and laughters, the tears and sorrows we shared though in between we break and patch for a few times, but she never leave my mind.. i ignore her becos i don't want to vent all the shit in me on her.. i think all of u reading this will not understand.. A guy that fails his Os.. outside he seem that he dun really care much about it.. but inside he is breaking. After that Dads company not making money, just abit more will go bankrupt he at this age should be studying and having fun. but he have to work, band, tkd and studying. inside him is so pain. He knows he is veri hush and rush.. thats y he ignore her at times. only after he calm down den he will go back.. sigh.. I really wanna share her laughter her sorrow. Cry with her Laugh with her.. But now i m crying on my own.. My first movie session is also the last with her. I know that her parent is also stressing on her.. but what can i do. i really wish that can talk to her parent tell them.. Their daughter is mature she know how to think, she really try very hard on her school work. Although infront of me she don't really cry. but i know she cried a hundred or even thousand times.. She alwaes say her life really sux, i wanna make her life shine. Sigh.. so much things i haven do for her.. In the past she use to ct her wrist.. i told her its stupid.. bt thats not the reason.. the true is that everytime i see or touch the wound. My heart become so pain.. I never expression my love to her before.. i keep everything inside..

Shuyi.. I got so much things in my mind to do and with u so much things to say to you... I really wish i can spend most of my time with u. But from now onwards.. i think i can only do that in my dream. I will miss u playing with my hands and my hair. I will miss hugging u. i will miss ur smile, ur laughter, ur cry, ur nag, ur complains... I will miss everything. What i will miss most.. is the love that u gave me from the start to the end.. Although u say u don't love me anymore.. But i will never say it.. becos my love for u will not lessen... it will grow.. when everytime i misses u alot.. i will call u 3 times and hang up.. dun have to pick up. Becos this 3 call tells you. "I Love U"

2005-08-09T10:37:00.000+08:00

This will be the last entry i blog.. after that most people will not get to contact me anymore.. mean call or sms i will not reply.. unless urgent. i gonna stay at home sleep eat go work and taekwondo.. nothing else.. SY... if get to know any good guy.. and he is interested in u.. go for him den.. i think DC is ok... although i dun really like him.. better take care of urself.. i gonna go missing cos i know u dun wanna see me so u will never see me again i hope.. and i will alwaes remember chrisjaime..

2005-07-26T23:46:00.000+08:00

Just come home from tkd training at temasek poly.. today's training was damn tough.. almost break my leg while doing stretchin.. i did a split and till my limit .. the coach go tampping on my legs... i felt that all the small little tube and those flesh gonna tear any time.. after that did some kicking and stamina training.. we kana punish becos one of the student call the coach by name.. then all of us get 40 push up, 40 sit up and 40 starjump.. damn xiong.. after that went for dinner or consider supper with my sirs.. my coach motor damn cool.. 2 exhust and is limited edition bike.. cooooll... by the way.. i cannot feel my leg anymore..

thats all for the day.. by the way.. more training tomorrow... fainting ........

2005-07-14T13:39:00.000+08:00

Ok.. i think i have to stop blogging with wrong sentence structure and shortcuts. This will only brings me to doom when i get to see my O level result. So more reading, talking and writing have to be done soon. ya soon.. So i have plan what i want to do for the future. Practice my audition score for the next SNYO audition. Do more revising and also work more. Train hard in taekwondo and be a coach. After get my Os i should go NAFA for diploma.( as u know i'm not interested in other things except music) bt before that i better get my Grade 5 in theory first, because i'm still struggling with grade 4.. or mayb go JC so that i can be a teacher in NIE. i simply love teaching. Its fun to see student progressing and also to be able to share ur knowledge to them. I don't know when will be the next time i blog.. but .. i will try ..

2005-05-25T00:46:00.000+08:00

I'm getting hang on a game call Initial D .. I started playing it since jan till now ... and i spent about 500 dollar and got myself 3 car.. toyota trueno the car jay chou gonna drive in his movie.. mazda RX 8 a veri fast car and mitsubishi evo 3 a fierce looking car... i gonna train hard and be a very good driver...
Bt i wun neglect my studies.. i try to get into JC though its difficult. but i'm gonna try

2005-05-17T15:45:00.000+08:00

24 hours a day is not enough for me.. O level is coming so fast that i just seem to notice its approaching. I am quite worried because i really got no confident with my languages. Maths and POA is another problem. My emaths teacher teach very slowly and he don't teach clearly. POA teacher is good, but in such a short time its is hard to achieve alot. My time is all on school, work, band, taekwondo..i really have to manage my time very well..
I had set some targets for the year 2005 : Mother Tongue: A1
English : B3
E Math : A1
Combined Science : B4
POA : B3
Get into JC
So this means that i will not be blogging and coming online until after O level.. And also i wish all friends taking O and N level this year to score well for ur exam. Bye

2005-05-03T16:51:00.000+08:00

Ok lets start...

Sat the band got speech day and its the last performance for all sec 4s .. After performance we got a mini celebration, den after that headed to tampinese with fidah and peeps for their CIP and guess what .. that day i spent over 30 buck.. bought a drumstick .. den went to work after that with yuexiang.. ya.. yuexiang now working at my place .. so happy..

Sun morning got nothing so watch vcd den abot afternoon meet yuexiang adrey and kit mun at tampines safra to play bowling den went to pavillion burger king to eat ... after that play arcade ... this means i miss my tkd training .. after that around 10 pm went to freddy house for majong and play till the next day 8am..

Mon.. Labour day so no school.. sleep since 8 plus to after 5 den bath den went out with family and a frenz who is treating us for dinner at a resturant.. its buffet so we eat and eat non stop.. went home stomach pain...

today.. school since 9.30 till 2.30 ,having chinese and POA.. after that went home lor.. later gonna work .. so sad

2005-04-16T14:06:00.000+08:00

its have been quite awhile since i last blog.. first i will like to announce a news.. BNSS symphonic band got Gold for this year SYF.. It finally pay off to those member's hardwork.. staying back for sectional and long hours of combines... but i hope all of them will work even harder now on ur school work becos studies is still veri impt... After hearing the announcement of the result.. was happy but also worried.. what i was worried about.. 1. band members boasting 2. jealousy will bring stress to the band 3. Gold means even tougher life for the members to maintain the standard 4. Mr Lim say before that a COP band will know their mistakes better den a Gold band and thats veri true.. Bt still everyone have done their best i hope is on all performance not only SYF.. Every performance, practices or sectionals are impt so please put ur SYF spirit on every of them... ONE BAND ONE HEART ONE SOUND....

About myself.. School starts.. quite alright.. got 80+/100 for science test... den start to learn POA .. thats veri fun... classmates quite noisy but friendly ..

Work 4 days a week for 7 to 11 at waraku katong... free come find me..

taekwondo grading over le... think will fail cos i forgotten to shout!!

Being doing GRade 4 and 5 theory revision.. and practice on piano and trmpet lor.. thinking to save den get a tutor.. den audition for SYO.. if i can !!..

Finally feel that my life is full.. no longer useless cos everyday is pack .. schooling, work, taewondo, music, alumni band ... so fun..

2005-03-08T11:14:00.000+08:00

Sunday morning went to yuexiang's house and watch jay chou concert, after that played bball.. den went to century square for some arcading.. after that went back to yue xiang hose to get really for taekwondo.. guess what.. 4 more weeks to grading.. if i luck and get double promotion i will be yellow belt in 4 weeks time.. if unlucky i will be a white tip... so gonna practice... dun think i more been touching music.. i compose 4 songs.. lol... bt in the end threw alway cos.. i find it no point to keep as i wrote them for leisure lol... anyway no one will appreciate lah.. den practice trumpet and piano lor... so long nv go band... dnnoe what happen to them... no choice .. i cannot go back cos gonna settle my family first... anyway... WORK HARD FOR SYF!!! and got ticket help me reserve 3 ok.. thanks

Monday nothing really happen... but went to my new job.. waraku at katong vllage.. den learn many things lor.. poor life have to work and work and work... who call me to be born poor... but if rich... think will be spoilt lor.. cos got lots of example i seen.. and poor people seems to be able to strive and suffering is like nothing to them already..

2005-03-05T12:20:00.000+08:00

Have been spenting most of my time job hunting and having fun.. so nv been updating my blog for some time..

Monday just took my Os result.. english C5, Chinese C5, Maths D7, Science,C6
Combine Humans C6. Sigh... bad rite my result.. especially my A1 maths become a D7 maths.. all my effort before O are wasted.. all the tuitioning by teachers all the money buying ten years series.. But i m not going to ITE..
Tuesday morning went back to school to ask to retake sec 5.. bt i can't cos my result pass, and the requirement is to fail one or 2 sbject .. after that went to meet kelvin cos he sick going see doc..

wednesday went to Temasek Poly for DAE... also not eligeble cos i get a 7 for maths... damn... den went Singapore poly to try luck.. bt result also the same..
thursday went to meet my friend at bedok to look at the private school... after that went movie at late night.. reach home around 12 plus..

Yesterday went meet wei leong at century square to by something.. cost me more den 50 dollar.. but its worth it.. cos its for someone special.. hows is she doing.. long time never talk to her le.. happy early birthday my ex dear..
after that went play pool at bedok den hougang too...

Today... gonna go work lor... at night will pdate more .. i hope..

2005-02-12T13:00:00.000+08:00

18 years living on earth.. i had seen many different people... no matter in religion, idea, gender, appearance...... I can concluded.. Life on earth is so refreshing... everyday u earn different things from different people... u know how people survived in a poor family... how a businessman strive to build his business empire.. how a mother take care of her child... how love, bonds r spread in a committee of people.. etc...

How to live a life happily... firstly.. keep a smile .. not only on ur face but also in ur heart.. Take serious things with a calm mind and try to solve it .. tell urself failure dun mean depress, but stepping a step higher as u learn something from it... Try ways to solve problem so that u wun get fed up as ur one way could not solve that pro... Most importantly.. Put urself in other peoples shoes and be opptimistic in everything that happen... remember tomorrow will be a better day...

Sigh... so called quarrel.. i promise never to quarrel as i wun wanna hurt anyone.. but no choice.. cos i find that sometime he things he do really hurts the people.. but yet he stll think he is rite.. Wanting to change a person, firstly.. treat the person well... gain the trust den make the person change willing...
u dun gain the trust... who will wanna care about u.. I think dealing with people that r walking the wrong path, we should not keep telling the person... eh.. u like that is wrong , but we should research find example den explain... in the ends he wanna listen anot.. is his decision.. advice only tell once... cos.. too many time.. u will become veri irritating.. never to say the person is wrong.. cos u will only hurt the person.. worst theat person may hate u.. and dun trust urself too much... cos.. people see u more den u see urself.. meaning people tend to judge u better den u judging urself...

2005-02-06T11:44:00.000+08:00

After reading wei leongs blog about valentine thingy... i think gonna do the same things he did on his blog... Write about past experiences with love, what i think of love and what kind of Love i am finding..

Erm.. bet i say that i got 9 ex stead, people will be.. " Damn that guy is a flirt". Yeah so what, can't a flirt change.. den people will say.. " Leopard can't change his spots".. No it can .. those that committed crime can turn into a new leaf, so why I cannot change??? .. After having 9 stead, i can conclude that, Knowing the people first den stead with the person was so right...

I m someone who thing alot.. I m more practical.. People say if love that person, no matter she is rich, ugly, poor, religion of wadever... u will still love her.. i agree that ugly poor i can still love the gal... but....religion and richness, cannot accept... cos... i want a happy relationship.. in diff religion, both of us will tend to quarrel cos of diff view of things tats wad i dn want.. rich.. i prefer one that is like me, who got to taste wad is call POOR... becos we can tahan being like that.. if i get a rich gal.. i scare i wun treat her like how her parent did.. i can't gve her what she use to have... Everything i do is for the current is for the future..

" Love, The most powerful weapon on earth, it has the ability to beautified the world, it can also destroy the world. When Love turns into happiness, it brings joy, warm, smiles.. When Love turns into hatred, war, tears and sorrow are seen...

2005-02-04T23:04:00.000+08:00

Actually i was damn pisses... Pissed becos i was thinking of being a saint to change some people to better ... but NO!!!, damn i think letting people taste their own medicine will help to let them know how much they hurt the people around them... never feel gulity yet say i veri mean... wad the hell... is being a good person so difficult... so people jsut dun want me to care about them, let them do wad they want... even seeing them rotting also keep quiet.. i m glad that people will talk nicly to me about my weakpoints or mistakes.. so please sumone stop saying wad u tolerate but i never... cos ... i never ask u to tolerate, if u think thats its unfair , let it be... I m jsut to help... forget it, wadever i say wun change... becos u think that u r like this and can never change... so sadly i tell u... i m also like this... i dun believe people cannot change... those who think that they r like this mean they r born like this, are just people with no brain and childish.. never think and do things...

but on the other hand i was veri glad, cos i saw the unitedness of the band. The high spirit of the band. Today i seen laughter and tears from the band members... Band i m proud of u guys... know i m not in much help, but i m already glad.. Today nicholes drop from exhaustion but he insist of trying again... i salute his determination... Haziz volenteer to help nicholes with his big tuba and nicholes will use his eupho... thats show that band members r helpful.. Today i learn another lesson.. moral is the most important thing to improve the band... cos its unite everyone together, and things will be done faster and easiler... ONE BAND ONE HEART ONE SOUND

2005-01-29T01:00:00.000+08:00

Xiaoling the vampire slayer

2005-01-29T00:59:00.001+08:00

Tian You the vampire

2005-01-29T00:59:00.000+08:00

tianyou and xiaoling daughter